I've seen a post lately on many Facebook walls about the Flu shot being "useless" and quoting Dr. Doshi. The article that is posted is found here: http://www.newsmaxhealth.com/Headline/influenza-virus-flu-vaccine-Peter-Doshi-Ph-D-/2013/05/16/id/504942
On the surface, it seems like a good, sound article. But, about midways thru, it throws up a HUGE red flag. They switch from Dr. Doshi's (he, by the way, is a researcher who has forced many pharmaceutical companies into releasing their clinical data, and particulary attacked the makers of Tamiflu. He's a trusted source, and they quote him in this article, but he does NOT advocate against the vaccine, merely against marketing it as it is) information to a "Dr. Russell Blaylock", who uses the phrase ""The vaccine is completely worthless, and the government knows it."
This, and his parroting of the mercury in the vaccines will kill you theory, led me to research him a little bit. Now, bear in mind, I am NOT a neurologist, I am not a member of the CDC. I'm just a nurse, with a good BS Barometer. But, what I turned up was that the man who makes a vastly over-reaching statement of "Mercury overstimulates the brain for several years, says Dr. Blaylock, and that activation is the cause of Alzheimer's and other degenerative diseases." has his own product... wait for it...
A BRAIN PROTECTION KIT!!! Yes, for $54, he'll keep you from getting Alzheimers, Parkinsons and all sorts of stuff. The best part?? It's for sale on the "news" website that the article is from! He'll actually "give" you the kit for free, if you just subscribe to his newsletter, a collection of non-peer-reviewed information from him. The $54 is for your subscription.
Now, considering that there has been multinational research into Alzheimers, and no clear cause has been found, but this guy states definitively that HE knows what causes it, he sounds like a quack to me. The fact that he is lashing out at vaccines, which have been proven to NOT cause Autism, no matter what Jenny McCarthy from former MTV "fame" tells you, makes the quacking noise come so loudly at me it's like a flock of ducks. Do ducks come in flocks? I have no idea.
So, should you or shouldn't you get a vaccine? I'm surrounded by unhealthy people with poor health habits all day at work. It's a no-brainer for me, I always get one. I've also never had the flu. Coincidence? I doubt it.
But, it's up to YOU. Decide for yourself. But, do it wisely. Don't let some quack trying to sell his newsletter fear-monger you into not getting it. Don't let some pharmaceutical company wanting to make money off you fear-monger you into getting it. Do sound research and decide for yourself. Look at non-biased groups, who aren't making money or receiving pharmaceutical company money. I always look to the CDC, because they are charged with the large-scale version of our health. What is best for the majority of us? That's what they see. But, again, arm yourself with knowledge and make your own call.
I will state one more time, for the record, I am NOT an authority on quacks, flu, vaccines, ducks, neurology, mercury, spandex, super-glue or many other things. Don't take my advice, because I'm "just a nurse." Make your own advice, folks. It works better that way.
Wednesday, October 30, 2013
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
An Open Note to the "Christian" carrying the doom 'n' gloom sign at the car show
Dear Doomsayer,
I'll give you a description to make sure you know that it's you I'm talking to. You had a sign about judgement that you lugged over your shoulder. You had on a t-shirt that had some more judgmental slogans on it. You had a bible in your left hand. You didn't speak to a single person. You wouldn't even make eye contact with anyone. You just stood there in the heat of the day, ignoring everyone.
Now, before I get down to brass tacks here, let me introduce myself. My name is Emily. I'm 40. I'm a Christian. I have a bad temper. I have to ask for forgiveness a LOT. I'm so far from perfect, I can't even see if with a set of binoculars. So, this is a little out of character for me. I can call people out with the best of them. I'm smart, you see. I have a really high IQ and a command of the English language that can flay you to the bone. But, I hold back. Because I like to be nice to people. But, you are screwing up my groove, Doomsayer. So, here we go.
In the title, I called you a "Christian." Please, notice the quotation marks. Those are to let you know that I don't mean it. Sure, you go to church. One that has a cross on the top. And, you sing the songs, and you listen to the message, and most likely, you get told that if you don't bring people over to Christianity, you're gonna have to answer for it. But, you don't want to actually work at it. As I think of it, you don't want to get DIRTY.
You don't want to deal with people who aren't exactly like you. You don't want to be uncomfortable. You don't want to deal with "those people." You know, the ones like Jesus helped. The ones with diseases (lepers then), the ones who sin openly (hello, prostitutes), the ones who commit crimes (thieves). You know, the ones that actually NEED help. You can't stand that thought. So, instead, you put on a sign, you carry a very new-looking bible and you just hang out and judge people from a distance, and think that will work. You really think you are racking up points.
But, I can say, with a decent amount of certainty, that if it comes down to you... refusing to even make eye contact, and obviously having never read half of that book you're toting around... and the elderly man who was walking around handing out bottles of water because it was so hot, and giving them to you with a pat on the shoulder and a "God Bless You," I think I can guess who's getting in first. I can guess who people saw reflecting the compassion of a loving Christ, of a caring Savior, and of a Savior who asked us to "love one another." It wasn't the guy judging. It was the guy sharing love. No one saw Christ in you. They just saw someone else telling them how awful they were. They saw someone spouting hatred. And, I know what I saw. I saw the Devil himself, using someone like you to drive people further and further away from Christianity, because when people think of Christianity, they think of people like you. Full of hate and judgment, but saying you serve a God of love.
Since you haven't read much of that book, I'll leave you with some of it:
Matthew 7:1 Judge not lest ye be judged.
Matthew 8:3 Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!" Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy. (please note: he held TOUCHED THE MAN. He didn't stand 50 feet away, with a sign, listening to his iPod and ignoring the man)
Luke 7:36-50 where a woman of sin comes and washes Jesus feet with her tears and he forgives her, with a rebuke for the man who thought he was better than her.
I know you will never read this, but I feel better getting it off my chest. I'll ask God to forgive me of the sin of pride in writing about how smart I am, and for the sin of judgment for judging you for judging others. But, mostly, I'll ask what I always ask. I'll ask him to do his will with me, and to help me be a better Child of God. I'll ask him to help me with my anger, and to help me see those who need me, and thru me Him. I'll also pray for you, Doomsayer. Because that's what my Lord charges me to do. Good Luck.
I'll give you a description to make sure you know that it's you I'm talking to. You had a sign about judgement that you lugged over your shoulder. You had on a t-shirt that had some more judgmental slogans on it. You had a bible in your left hand. You didn't speak to a single person. You wouldn't even make eye contact with anyone. You just stood there in the heat of the day, ignoring everyone.
Now, before I get down to brass tacks here, let me introduce myself. My name is Emily. I'm 40. I'm a Christian. I have a bad temper. I have to ask for forgiveness a LOT. I'm so far from perfect, I can't even see if with a set of binoculars. So, this is a little out of character for me. I can call people out with the best of them. I'm smart, you see. I have a really high IQ and a command of the English language that can flay you to the bone. But, I hold back. Because I like to be nice to people. But, you are screwing up my groove, Doomsayer. So, here we go.
In the title, I called you a "Christian." Please, notice the quotation marks. Those are to let you know that I don't mean it. Sure, you go to church. One that has a cross on the top. And, you sing the songs, and you listen to the message, and most likely, you get told that if you don't bring people over to Christianity, you're gonna have to answer for it. But, you don't want to actually work at it. As I think of it, you don't want to get DIRTY.
You don't want to deal with people who aren't exactly like you. You don't want to be uncomfortable. You don't want to deal with "those people." You know, the ones like Jesus helped. The ones with diseases (lepers then), the ones who sin openly (hello, prostitutes), the ones who commit crimes (thieves). You know, the ones that actually NEED help. You can't stand that thought. So, instead, you put on a sign, you carry a very new-looking bible and you just hang out and judge people from a distance, and think that will work. You really think you are racking up points.
But, I can say, with a decent amount of certainty, that if it comes down to you... refusing to even make eye contact, and obviously having never read half of that book you're toting around... and the elderly man who was walking around handing out bottles of water because it was so hot, and giving them to you with a pat on the shoulder and a "God Bless You," I think I can guess who's getting in first. I can guess who people saw reflecting the compassion of a loving Christ, of a caring Savior, and of a Savior who asked us to "love one another." It wasn't the guy judging. It was the guy sharing love. No one saw Christ in you. They just saw someone else telling them how awful they were. They saw someone spouting hatred. And, I know what I saw. I saw the Devil himself, using someone like you to drive people further and further away from Christianity, because when people think of Christianity, they think of people like you. Full of hate and judgment, but saying you serve a God of love.
Since you haven't read much of that book, I'll leave you with some of it:
Matthew 7:1 Judge not lest ye be judged.
Matthew 8:3 Jesus reached out his hand and touched the man. "I am willing," he said. "Be clean!" Immediately he was cleansed of his leprosy. (please note: he held TOUCHED THE MAN. He didn't stand 50 feet away, with a sign, listening to his iPod and ignoring the man)
Luke 7:36-50 where a woman of sin comes and washes Jesus feet with her tears and he forgives her, with a rebuke for the man who thought he was better than her.
I know you will never read this, but I feel better getting it off my chest. I'll ask God to forgive me of the sin of pride in writing about how smart I am, and for the sin of judgment for judging you for judging others. But, mostly, I'll ask what I always ask. I'll ask him to do his will with me, and to help me be a better Child of God. I'll ask him to help me with my anger, and to help me see those who need me, and thru me Him. I'll also pray for you, Doomsayer. Because that's what my Lord charges me to do. Good Luck.
Tuesday, April 9, 2013
Awesome Businesses (during some crazy times)
In the past few months, I've dealt with more companies than I probably have in my entire life. With Dad passing, us moving, having house repairs done, buying cars, etc., we've seen a ton of businesses, and deal with a lot of folks. The amazing thing is, the experiences have been overwhelmingly positive.
I, like most people, tend to tell people about the lousy things happening. I forget to pass on that somewhere did a GREAT job. So, let me take this opportunity to tell you about some GREAT local businesses, owned and/or staffed by some GREAT people. And, one national corporation that sucks.
Let's start the accolades with an odd thing to deal with following a death... trading a car. Shortly before Dad passed away, he traded for a HUGE new Suburban. This thing had every bell and whistle you could get. And, um... it was the size of a small country. Seriously, I got stuck in a parking space, because I didn't have room to back it out without taking out the cars on either side of me. When he passed, I knew Mom could NEVER drive this thing. It terrified her. So, my dear hubby took it back to Champion Chevrolet in Johnson City. Our wonderful salesperson remembered Dad trading for the truck and when Chad explained the situation, he went so far above and beyond what he could have. He helped Chad find a car mom could drive. Mom also snuck and had Chad get ME a car as well (mine had over 100,000 miles on it). Even with the Suburban having only 1500 miles on it, it had been titled, and they could have hosed us for that. But, they didn't. They did a great deal for us. They got us 2 cars and money back. Everyone likes to bash car sales as such an unethical business. But, these folks were absolutely wonderful. They have called to check on us, and even sent a sympathy card. http://www.championjc.com/
In the midst of Dad's hospitalization, Mom and Dad's house sold. Our realtor was ah-mazing. She took us house hunting on a holiday weekend, ferried papers back and forth into the hospital (even having to wear an isolation gown into the room to get papers signed, for Pete's sake!), bringing us breakfast (and refusing to take $ for it), and just being the most amazing realtor EVER!! Her name is Donna Sartin, and she works for Coldwell Bankers. http://www.coldwellbanker.com/agent?action=detail&agentId=15619&mode=detail She helped us pack, she helped us move. You cannot ask for a more wonderful person to know, let alone to sell your house. LOVE this woman!!
At the hospital, we had no idea what funeral home to use. A hospice nurse recommended Tetrick Funeral Home in Johnson City. Oh, what a wonderful group of people. They never pushed us to spend more than we wanted. They were so kind. They helped us navigate the crazy world of death. They helped us with social security, death certificates, etc. They actually issued us a REFUND for overbilling. We would never have known. They have remained in touch, and invite us to a survivor's group every month. We haven't gone, but it is so nice that they do something like that for the people who have used their services. We spent very little, because Dad's wishes were so specific and so bare-bones. But, they treated us like we were spending millions. http://www.tetrickfuneralhome.com/
53 years my parents were married. They had 53 years worth of stuff to deal with. And pack. Did I mention it included everything from 16 boxes of (heavy) books and 4 sets of china? East Tennessee Movers (and the wonderful Rita Eggers) packed up every single thing in that house, down to Mom's undies (well, they were in the dresser drawers and they packed those, so it counts). Not one single item was damaged. Nothing broken, nothing misplaced. And you could not find a sweeter bunch of guys. Mom was ready to adopt them all, and I think the feeling was mutual. These guys lugged and loaded in the snow without a word of complaint. They were amazing!! http://www.easttnmovers.com/
We had the um.... interesting problem of our home inspector missing a very strange thing... he didn't notice that none of the exterior doors locked. Ooooops. We really needed that fixed. So, we called Donna (did I mention she's the best realtor ever??) and she got a locksmith there that same day!!! David Irick of Johnson City Locksmith was amazing. He rekeyed all the locks, worked to get them actually working and told us to just tell Donna thank you. We thought she'd paid for it. He was gone before we found out he just did it for free to be sweet. I guess he knew we'd been thru a lot and could use some sweetness. I am not the least bit ashamed to admit it made me cry. So, so nice. http://johnsoncitytnlocksmith.com/
With any new house, you find a few kinks to work out. We didn't like the wall colors, so enter another one of Donna's referrals... Robert Santucci. He and his Dad painted several huge rooms for us. Our part took 4 coats of yellow to cover. Not a single drip out of place, the walls look beautiful. SUPER nice guys. Totally professional and worth every single dime!!! http://paintersource.com/Painters/1250-Robert-Santucci/View-details.html (don't think he has his own website, he pretty much stays booked up from referrals, but this site has his number. You WILL have to wait, because he is the BEST. He is totally worth the wait!!!!).
I didn't have a kitchen. At all. So, we needed a plumber. Because kitchens need sinks. Have I mentioned Donna knows EVERYONE?? Yup, enter Robbie the plumber! I don't even know his business name. I just call him up and say, "Robbie! HELP!" and he's there! He worked his butt off and charged me so little that I added extra to the check. Seriously. He also caught 3 mistakes that had never been caught on the original plumbing, including a sewer pipe not being glued, just hand-tightened. They also cleaned up every single drop of mess they made. They vacuumed!! Robbie's number is 423 773 0746
Our thermostat could be programmed to launch the space shuttle, and I was entirely too darn tired and confused to use it. We also needed to split our main electric panel into a sub panel to handle the new lines we'd run for the kitchen. Now, my Dad was an electrician and so was Chad. So, I expect the best, and I will know if your lines look like crap. Enter Lonnie the electrician. Another Donna find! Such a sweet guy. And, let me tell you... OCD!!! That box was wired perfectly, every line labeled clearly and tacked up and lined up like little little soldiers. My Dad would have been proud, and Chad actually said, "This guy needs meds worse than me." That's a compliment. I promise. So, again, I don't know his company name. He's in my iPhone as "Lonnie Electrician." Mention Donna Sartin sent you ('cause she did, via me) and he's your new best friend! 423 360 1284
Lastly, we had to recharge the HVAC unit. One of my work friends gave me Lamb's Heating and Cooling's number and saved the day. He had it done in such a short amount of time, and was super nice. He's gonna be coming back soon to cut me in some ducts for our part of the house, 'cause it's gonna get hot soon, and I do NOT do hot! http://www.lambsheatandair.com/air-conditioner-furnace-hvac-contractor/Johnson-City-TN-37601-37604-37615.php
Now, what on earth could these small businesses do that a giant couldn't? Fix something. Let me tell you about Verizon. Dad had a wireless account with them. I just needed it to shut it off. I called them, and was told I had to go to the store with a death certificate to get it cut off. I did that. When I got there, they said that has never been a requirement, and they can't even turn off service from there. They gave me the phone there to call and cancel it. I did. A month later, still got a bill. Called again. Cancelled it. Again. Got another bill. Called and was not nearly as nice. "Oh. We only cancelled one line. Not both." Cancelled it. Again. Snet Verizon a letter, including Dad's full name and explaining how un-fun it had been to make multiple calls and discuss my Dad's death over and over again. Got a letter telling me how sorry they were, and that they couldn't find his account, but they were sure it'd be fixed. Got another bill. Still not fixed. Talked to someone AGAIN. Told it was fixed and that they'd call me to make sure it went thru. Haven't heard anything. Not holding my breath. Way to go, Verizon. Way to go. My contract was up on two of our lines this month. I was really considering Verizon. NO. WAY. IN. HELL. So, congrats on losing a customer and having the dubious distinction of screwing up an account for over 4 months. Impressive.
I, like most people, tend to tell people about the lousy things happening. I forget to pass on that somewhere did a GREAT job. So, let me take this opportunity to tell you about some GREAT local businesses, owned and/or staffed by some GREAT people. And, one national corporation that sucks.
Let's start the accolades with an odd thing to deal with following a death... trading a car. Shortly before Dad passed away, he traded for a HUGE new Suburban. This thing had every bell and whistle you could get. And, um... it was the size of a small country. Seriously, I got stuck in a parking space, because I didn't have room to back it out without taking out the cars on either side of me. When he passed, I knew Mom could NEVER drive this thing. It terrified her. So, my dear hubby took it back to Champion Chevrolet in Johnson City. Our wonderful salesperson remembered Dad trading for the truck and when Chad explained the situation, he went so far above and beyond what he could have. He helped Chad find a car mom could drive. Mom also snuck and had Chad get ME a car as well (mine had over 100,000 miles on it). Even with the Suburban having only 1500 miles on it, it had been titled, and they could have hosed us for that. But, they didn't. They did a great deal for us. They got us 2 cars and money back. Everyone likes to bash car sales as such an unethical business. But, these folks were absolutely wonderful. They have called to check on us, and even sent a sympathy card. http://www.championjc.com/
In the midst of Dad's hospitalization, Mom and Dad's house sold. Our realtor was ah-mazing. She took us house hunting on a holiday weekend, ferried papers back and forth into the hospital (even having to wear an isolation gown into the room to get papers signed, for Pete's sake!), bringing us breakfast (and refusing to take $ for it), and just being the most amazing realtor EVER!! Her name is Donna Sartin, and she works for Coldwell Bankers. http://www.coldwellbanker.com/agent?action=detail&agentId=15619&mode=detail She helped us pack, she helped us move. You cannot ask for a more wonderful person to know, let alone to sell your house. LOVE this woman!!
At the hospital, we had no idea what funeral home to use. A hospice nurse recommended Tetrick Funeral Home in Johnson City. Oh, what a wonderful group of people. They never pushed us to spend more than we wanted. They were so kind. They helped us navigate the crazy world of death. They helped us with social security, death certificates, etc. They actually issued us a REFUND for overbilling. We would never have known. They have remained in touch, and invite us to a survivor's group every month. We haven't gone, but it is so nice that they do something like that for the people who have used their services. We spent very little, because Dad's wishes were so specific and so bare-bones. But, they treated us like we were spending millions. http://www.tetrickfuneralhome.com/
53 years my parents were married. They had 53 years worth of stuff to deal with. And pack. Did I mention it included everything from 16 boxes of (heavy) books and 4 sets of china? East Tennessee Movers (and the wonderful Rita Eggers) packed up every single thing in that house, down to Mom's undies (well, they were in the dresser drawers and they packed those, so it counts). Not one single item was damaged. Nothing broken, nothing misplaced. And you could not find a sweeter bunch of guys. Mom was ready to adopt them all, and I think the feeling was mutual. These guys lugged and loaded in the snow without a word of complaint. They were amazing!! http://www.easttnmovers.com/
We had the um.... interesting problem of our home inspector missing a very strange thing... he didn't notice that none of the exterior doors locked. Ooooops. We really needed that fixed. So, we called Donna (did I mention she's the best realtor ever??) and she got a locksmith there that same day!!! David Irick of Johnson City Locksmith was amazing. He rekeyed all the locks, worked to get them actually working and told us to just tell Donna thank you. We thought she'd paid for it. He was gone before we found out he just did it for free to be sweet. I guess he knew we'd been thru a lot and could use some sweetness. I am not the least bit ashamed to admit it made me cry. So, so nice. http://johnsoncitytnlocksmith.com/
With any new house, you find a few kinks to work out. We didn't like the wall colors, so enter another one of Donna's referrals... Robert Santucci. He and his Dad painted several huge rooms for us. Our part took 4 coats of yellow to cover. Not a single drip out of place, the walls look beautiful. SUPER nice guys. Totally professional and worth every single dime!!! http://paintersource.com/Painters/1250-Robert-Santucci/View-details.html (don't think he has his own website, he pretty much stays booked up from referrals, but this site has his number. You WILL have to wait, because he is the BEST. He is totally worth the wait!!!!).
I didn't have a kitchen. At all. So, we needed a plumber. Because kitchens need sinks. Have I mentioned Donna knows EVERYONE?? Yup, enter Robbie the plumber! I don't even know his business name. I just call him up and say, "Robbie! HELP!" and he's there! He worked his butt off and charged me so little that I added extra to the check. Seriously. He also caught 3 mistakes that had never been caught on the original plumbing, including a sewer pipe not being glued, just hand-tightened. They also cleaned up every single drop of mess they made. They vacuumed!! Robbie's number is 423 773 0746
Our thermostat could be programmed to launch the space shuttle, and I was entirely too darn tired and confused to use it. We also needed to split our main electric panel into a sub panel to handle the new lines we'd run for the kitchen. Now, my Dad was an electrician and so was Chad. So, I expect the best, and I will know if your lines look like crap. Enter Lonnie the electrician. Another Donna find! Such a sweet guy. And, let me tell you... OCD!!! That box was wired perfectly, every line labeled clearly and tacked up and lined up like little little soldiers. My Dad would have been proud, and Chad actually said, "This guy needs meds worse than me." That's a compliment. I promise. So, again, I don't know his company name. He's in my iPhone as "Lonnie Electrician." Mention Donna Sartin sent you ('cause she did, via me) and he's your new best friend! 423 360 1284
Lastly, we had to recharge the HVAC unit. One of my work friends gave me Lamb's Heating and Cooling's number and saved the day. He had it done in such a short amount of time, and was super nice. He's gonna be coming back soon to cut me in some ducts for our part of the house, 'cause it's gonna get hot soon, and I do NOT do hot! http://www.lambsheatandair.com/air-conditioner-furnace-hvac-contractor/Johnson-City-TN-37601-37604-37615.php
Now, what on earth could these small businesses do that a giant couldn't? Fix something. Let me tell you about Verizon. Dad had a wireless account with them. I just needed it to shut it off. I called them, and was told I had to go to the store with a death certificate to get it cut off. I did that. When I got there, they said that has never been a requirement, and they can't even turn off service from there. They gave me the phone there to call and cancel it. I did. A month later, still got a bill. Called again. Cancelled it. Again. Got another bill. Called and was not nearly as nice. "Oh. We only cancelled one line. Not both." Cancelled it. Again. Snet Verizon a letter, including Dad's full name and explaining how un-fun it had been to make multiple calls and discuss my Dad's death over and over again. Got a letter telling me how sorry they were, and that they couldn't find his account, but they were sure it'd be fixed. Got another bill. Still not fixed. Talked to someone AGAIN. Told it was fixed and that they'd call me to make sure it went thru. Haven't heard anything. Not holding my breath. Way to go, Verizon. Way to go. My contract was up on two of our lines this month. I was really considering Verizon. NO. WAY. IN. HELL. So, congrats on losing a customer and having the dubious distinction of screwing up an account for over 4 months. Impressive.
Monday, April 1, 2013
Random Emilyisms
I'm sure this will come as a surprise to no one, but there is a LOT of noise in my head. As in, things running thru my brain. Random, odd thoughts that I think of as Emilyisms. They aren't worth a whole blog, but are often too long for a FB update. So, they kick around in my head for a while, unable to find a home, and finally they demand to be freed! So, here they are today:
In the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter novels by Laurell K Hamilton, the phrase "white goat" is used to indicate a human who is to be used as a sacrifice for some kind of supernatural ritual. In the game I used to play on Facebook, Cityville, you have a small farm and you one of the things you earn for taking care of your farm is a white goat. I had a ton of them, and it just amused me to no end every time I got another one. I just have this image of a tiny little woman in black stomping out into my farm and raising the dead with the white goat. Yeah, I know... only me.
Not-a-mom: I don't have children by choice. Chad never wanted any and neither did I. Kind of makes us the perfect couple. But, what does make me sad is how many people accost us for our choice or who just have no sensitivity. Not everyone knows that we are childless by choice. And, often, people will ask us, "So when are you gonna have a kid?" or some variation of that. My standard reply is, "About the time you get manners, I guess." I mean, what if I was unable to have a child and wanted one desperately??? How cruel a question would that be to ask someone who cannot have a child? Rub some salt in their wound, why don't you?! Geez.
Recent signs I'm getting old: I hate top 40 music. I don't know anyone on the cover of People Magazine. Way too many people who are driving look too young to have a license. Your music is too darn loud. I can't hear anything any more. Certain technology escapes me. I really do not care what comes after Blu Ray. I'm done buying machines for movies I watch once. I hate skinny jeans and think people wearing them look like dorky fashion victims. I avoid the mall simply to not have to deal with teenagers. I haven't had a hairstyle change in YEARS. I hate waiting in line at restaurants, so I go early.
The Jonesborough Farmers Market offers a 50% discount to anyone paying with EBT (aka food stamps) for online orders. I am a little torn on this. It's nice they are helping people with financial difficulties get high quality food. But, considering the fact that I am paying full price, working full time and taking care of a LOTTA inmates who get food stamps... I am little peeved. Talk amongst ya'selves. What do you think?
What thoughts ramble in your head? What drives you crazy? What makes you think? Share!
In the Anita Blake: Vampire Hunter novels by Laurell K Hamilton, the phrase "white goat" is used to indicate a human who is to be used as a sacrifice for some kind of supernatural ritual. In the game I used to play on Facebook, Cityville, you have a small farm and you one of the things you earn for taking care of your farm is a white goat. I had a ton of them, and it just amused me to no end every time I got another one. I just have this image of a tiny little woman in black stomping out into my farm and raising the dead with the white goat. Yeah, I know... only me.
Not-a-mom: I don't have children by choice. Chad never wanted any and neither did I. Kind of makes us the perfect couple. But, what does make me sad is how many people accost us for our choice or who just have no sensitivity. Not everyone knows that we are childless by choice. And, often, people will ask us, "So when are you gonna have a kid?" or some variation of that. My standard reply is, "About the time you get manners, I guess." I mean, what if I was unable to have a child and wanted one desperately??? How cruel a question would that be to ask someone who cannot have a child? Rub some salt in their wound, why don't you?! Geez.
Recent signs I'm getting old: I hate top 40 music. I don't know anyone on the cover of People Magazine. Way too many people who are driving look too young to have a license. Your music is too darn loud. I can't hear anything any more. Certain technology escapes me. I really do not care what comes after Blu Ray. I'm done buying machines for movies I watch once. I hate skinny jeans and think people wearing them look like dorky fashion victims. I avoid the mall simply to not have to deal with teenagers. I haven't had a hairstyle change in YEARS. I hate waiting in line at restaurants, so I go early.
The Jonesborough Farmers Market offers a 50% discount to anyone paying with EBT (aka food stamps) for online orders. I am a little torn on this. It's nice they are helping people with financial difficulties get high quality food. But, considering the fact that I am paying full price, working full time and taking care of a LOTTA inmates who get food stamps... I am little peeved. Talk amongst ya'selves. What do you think?
What thoughts ramble in your head? What drives you crazy? What makes you think? Share!
Sunday, March 31, 2013
Let's try this again
When I was a kid, I must have bought 1000 blank books. All that promise! Glorious, empty pages for me to fill with all my ideas, my thoughts, my feelings. But, within a few weeks (or days, even) of writing stuff, I'd just sort of forget about it. It was too much bother, and seriously... Barbie was NOT going to dress herself. I had things to do! So, I'd forget for a while, then find a new, pretty blank book and start over.
It turns out, I do that with blogs. Seriously, I think I've started 3 and lost steam. Now, Clyde is still going strong, just not getting posts much because... SNOW + CAMPER RENOVATION= NO GO! But, it's the only one I've ever stuck with.
So, I thought today, as many thoughts as Iv'e had racing through my little head, I need to start blogging again. But, instead of starting a new one, let's just go back to the old one. Let's not buy a new pretty book, but finish the one we have!
So, here's to new beginnings, or do-overs.
As it is Easter Day, the time of resurrection, it seems appropriate! Rise again and try to keep focused this time.
Wish me luck!
It turns out, I do that with blogs. Seriously, I think I've started 3 and lost steam. Now, Clyde is still going strong, just not getting posts much because... SNOW + CAMPER RENOVATION= NO GO! But, it's the only one I've ever stuck with.
So, I thought today, as many thoughts as Iv'e had racing through my little head, I need to start blogging again. But, instead of starting a new one, let's just go back to the old one. Let's not buy a new pretty book, but finish the one we have!
So, here's to new beginnings, or do-overs.
As it is Easter Day, the time of resurrection, it seems appropriate! Rise again and try to keep focused this time.
Wish me luck!
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
The joys of being CRAZY
Ah, spring time. April showers bring May flowers. Oh, and panic attacks. Yeah, they don't bloom, they just show up, unannounced and uninvited. They just sneak up on you in the middle of the night, or while you're sitting at your desk and make you feel as if, for no reason, you need to get up and RUN.
Your heart pounds, your pupils dilate, you break out in a sweat. You feel like there is an elephant on your chest. Impending doom? Check! Pure terror? Check! Mortal embarrassment if you are doing all of this in public? Check!
For whatever reason, my panic attacks are always worse when it rains, and especially when it storms. I've tracked it and it seems to be whenever there are large changes in barometric pressure. Why this would impact a chemical imbalance, I have no idea. But, it gives me a little head's up, but not always. 90% of the time, the rain doesn't mean a panic attack, so I'm braced to fight... and nothing happens. But, that 10% is so fun. That's sarcasm, if you don't know that.
And, currently this is much worse. Because my stupid insurance decided that paying for Lexapro, the antidepressant I've had EXCELLENT results with for over 3 years, is too expensive. So, they made me change to either Zoloft or Celexa. I've already tried Celexa and it made me so lethargic. I didn't want to do anything. So, that wasn't an option. So, what choice do I have? Zoloft.
It seemed to work for a while, but about the time it should have been getting therapeutic, I noticed an odd little side effect...
I'm chewing the inside of my mouth. I don't mean a little, I mean a lot. Right now, my lips are actually swollen because of it. What the heck?? Being crazy wasn't quite enough? I have to do this, too? Really? And, tonight, I can feel a panic attack coming. I'll take something to ward it off, which will result in me being in a rotten mood tomorrow (consider yourself warned, coworkers) and not sleeping well.
So, to sum up, tomorrow I will be cranky, sleepy, swollen-mouthed and crazy. Wow, isn't this fun?!
Ugh.
Anyway, I'll call my doctor tomorrow and tell him despite the best efforts I could possibly make, I can't do the Zoloft. Then, we will go into a period of intense fighting with my insurance company. I can scarcely wait! Eventually, I will get permission from the insurance to go back on Lexapro. Again. Which I shouldn't have quit taking, because it worked. But, since it cost them extra money, hey... what's my discomfort? Nothing, to them!
I promise, when I am not all in pain, cranky and crazy, I will do a fun and/or funny blog. Soon, if I get my CRAZY pills back. LOL!!
Until then, just enjoy the mental image of me all poof-mouthed and pacing. I'm a Poofy-pacer! *snort*
Your heart pounds, your pupils dilate, you break out in a sweat. You feel like there is an elephant on your chest. Impending doom? Check! Pure terror? Check! Mortal embarrassment if you are doing all of this in public? Check!
For whatever reason, my panic attacks are always worse when it rains, and especially when it storms. I've tracked it and it seems to be whenever there are large changes in barometric pressure. Why this would impact a chemical imbalance, I have no idea. But, it gives me a little head's up, but not always. 90% of the time, the rain doesn't mean a panic attack, so I'm braced to fight... and nothing happens. But, that 10% is so fun. That's sarcasm, if you don't know that.
And, currently this is much worse. Because my stupid insurance decided that paying for Lexapro, the antidepressant I've had EXCELLENT results with for over 3 years, is too expensive. So, they made me change to either Zoloft or Celexa. I've already tried Celexa and it made me so lethargic. I didn't want to do anything. So, that wasn't an option. So, what choice do I have? Zoloft.
It seemed to work for a while, but about the time it should have been getting therapeutic, I noticed an odd little side effect...
I'm chewing the inside of my mouth. I don't mean a little, I mean a lot. Right now, my lips are actually swollen because of it. What the heck?? Being crazy wasn't quite enough? I have to do this, too? Really? And, tonight, I can feel a panic attack coming. I'll take something to ward it off, which will result in me being in a rotten mood tomorrow (consider yourself warned, coworkers) and not sleeping well.
So, to sum up, tomorrow I will be cranky, sleepy, swollen-mouthed and crazy. Wow, isn't this fun?!
Ugh.
Anyway, I'll call my doctor tomorrow and tell him despite the best efforts I could possibly make, I can't do the Zoloft. Then, we will go into a period of intense fighting with my insurance company. I can scarcely wait! Eventually, I will get permission from the insurance to go back on Lexapro. Again. Which I shouldn't have quit taking, because it worked. But, since it cost them extra money, hey... what's my discomfort? Nothing, to them!
I promise, when I am not all in pain, cranky and crazy, I will do a fun and/or funny blog. Soon, if I get my CRAZY pills back. LOL!!
Until then, just enjoy the mental image of me all poof-mouthed and pacing. I'm a Poofy-pacer! *snort*
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Interviewing: the scary part, with Auntie Em
Well, your concisely written resume (which, along with your cover letter was customized for each place you sent it, right??) and your accurately completed application have landed you the interview. This is the part that makes the vast majority of people want to throw up. There will be weird questions that throw you off. There will be someone you have never met, with whom you have to carry on a conversation and convince you are exactly what they want (and seem friendly, but not too friendly. Professional but not aloof. Perfect, but not better than the interviewer). Honestly, just typing this makes me queasy, and I am really good at being interviewed. I have never interviewed for a job and not gotten it (well, with the exception of the one interview I walked out on. And, yes, I told you not to do that, but hey... do as I say, okay?). I'm going to give you information I've gleaned from both sides of the desk, both as interviewer of hundreds and she who has had over 13 jobs (and interviewed for many more than that).
Go in dressed well. I don't care if you are applying for a job that never wears dress clothes. Wear them. You don't have to have a 3 piece suit or a dress (unless you are interviewing for a job that has those as their normal dress code). But, dress nicely. Nurses wear scrubs in the vast majority of their jobs. But, you should still come dressed in dress pants and a nice shirt, at the very least. If you come in your scrubs, it better be because you just got off work. You are showing me that you respect the job and the place of employment enough to put forth some efforts. If you come in jeans, you are not making a good impression on me. If they are torn jeans, your interview is over before it started. Your hair and makeup need to be neat and understated. No peacock-like hair or night club eyeshadow.
Along with the no jeans rule, do not wear anything revealing, low-cut shirts or barely-there skirts. Nothing sheer, nothing tight. Make sure your clothes match (I do NOT have good luck with that, myself. I have worn scrubs for so long I can't even dress myself any more. That's why I wear dresses to interview. It's one piece. Add hose and the only thing I have to match are my shoes.
Oh, and let's talk about shoes. No spike heels, no hooker boots. No flip-flops. If you are wearing sandals, make sure your toenails are neat and that you do not have terrifying callouses on your feet. I worked with a woman once who had the SCARIEST feet in the world. Seriously, she practically had hooves. If I would have been interviewing her, she'd have never gotten past me with those things. Fair? No. But, seriously... feet freak me out!!!
Now, you look like a million bucks. As you are heading out the door, make sure you have your resume, any paperwork they asked you to bring or that you would like to share with the interviewer. Make sure you have a pen or twelve (what if one dries out? Be prepared!). If you use reading glasses, bring them.
Get there no more than 5 minutes early. If I tell you to be there at 10, and you are there at 9:30am, I'm going to try to not keep you waiting, so I'm going to be rushing. If I'm in a rush, I will not be as relaxed and receptive. Early is good in a lot of ways, but really early is not. If you show up late, it is the death knell for your interview, unless there has been a massive explosion and/or zombie invasion that blocked traffic. Tardiness always gets worse the longer someone works somewhere. If you cannot be there in time for the interview, I can only imagine the time your coworkers are going to be wasting waiting on you to show up. And, when your coworkers get mad, I have to listen to them complain.
When you walk in the door, greet whomever is there, nicely and professionally. With a smile. Be polite, and if they initiate small talk, work it. If you are abrupt with them, they're going to tell me after you leave. If you are rude to my happy little peeps, I will get you and your little dog, too. :-)
When you meet me, shake my hand. Now this is where it gets tricky. I've had countless talks with people who hire others, and we all agree on something. If you have a lousy handshake, you are going to have to work really hard to get past it. By a good handshake, I mean firm, but not bone-crushing. None of that limp dead-fish stuff. And, don't do that thing where you hold your hand out to me palm down. You know, as if you are offering it to me to kiss. You're not the queen or the pope. You need to extend your hand to me sideways, palm in. Hold the handshake until I start to pull away. Do NOT do that spooky thing where you hold my hand like we are prom dates. Seriously, it makes me think you are a serial killer. Likewise, do not do the double clasp. Unless you are planning to wrestle me for the job, one hand is plenty.
Wait to sit until I motion for you to, or until I sit down myself. It wouldn't bother me, but I've heard several hiring managers complain that the person came in and flopped down in a chair like they owned the place. So, go in slow! Also, don't slouch or sit like you are planning to pop out of the seat and run. Comfortable and relaxed is key.
Let me guide the conversation. Do not EVER interrupt me, or finish my sentences. Again, this isn't my pet peeve, but it is for most managers. Pause before you answer a question. Think it through.
Let the personality of the interviewer set the tone of your interview. If they are all business, do not cut up. They may have no sense of humor and are not going to appreciate yours. If they do cut up, laugh at their jokes. Not that scary, hyena laugh, just a good laugh. No matter how casual your interviewer is, do not curse or bad mouth your former employer. Don't mention drinking habits or any partying ways.
If you hated your job, and your boss was an evil zombie troll, you dont' have to pretend to love them. But, don't call them a bitch and say you hated it. Just say that you loved the type of job you did, but it wasn't challenging enough or the company seemed to have a dynamic you just didn't fit into. Or, even that you are looking to do something completely different, if you are applying for a job different than your last one.
There are a lot of standard questions you will be asked. I am so sick of them, and know that most people know they are coming, so I refuse to use them in an interview. But, most people will. So, here's the most common one:
Why are you interested in this job? This is where you indicate that you have a good understanding of both the job and the company. Tell them what you like about their company, what sounds good about the job. Tell them what you have done in the past that will help you meet that company's goals.
Why are you leaving your current job? Be honest, but nice. See above.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I'd rather eat vegetables than answer this question. I see myself as a lottery winner in Maui. But, I don't think that is what they want to hear. Seriously, why does anyone ask this? But, they do. Here is what they want to hear. They want you to tell them that you see yourself still there, but advancing yourself. Not into management or into their job (unless those are the jobs you are already applying for), but advancing in knowledge, maybe taking some classes.
What are your strengths? Hit on the key points they mentioned in the ad. If it says someone with great IV skills, point out yours. If it says you need to be proficient with MS Office, point out how much you have done with it. If the ad was vague, point out how you are always punctual, you always complete work timely, you have always had good reviews, you have good leadership skills, etc.
What are your weaknesses? This is the only question I hate more than the 5 year question. Seriously, it sucks. What kind of idiot tells you that they're weak, but that's what they are asking. Use this question to again play up your strengths. "Oh, I hate paperwork, I think most nurses do, but I am good at it!" or "I am nowhere near as comfortable with Excel as I am PowerPoint, but I actually took a class in Excel recently and am doing so much better." Even if your weakness is that you hate people and really don't ever want to work again, it's best not to mention that. Gloss over it. :-)
What kind of salary do you need (or similar)? Be honest with them, but try to hedge a little. You do not want to low-ball it. I always offer what is there, no matter if the person tells me they will take less. But, there are a lot of people who may be able to offer you $27 an hour, but will gladly give you the $16 you just told them you'd take. When they ask, you can smile and ask, "You know, I've been out of the market for a while, I'm not even sure what the going rate is for my position. What do you usually start people out at for this job?" But, if they push you, tell them what you really have to have. You cannot take the job for less than you need, so don't offer to do so.
Do you have any questions? You think this should be easy. It isn't. You should have questions. There is no way that I took 30 or 45 minutes and told you everything you should know about the job. Ask me how long orientation is. Ask me how many offices we have. Ask me something that makes you sound intelligent. Do not ask me about how long you have to be there before you can take vacation or how liberal our casual Friday policy is. Don't ask me what our policy is on workplace romance. It's a business, not e-Harmony. Don't ask questions that make you sound like an idiot or a lazy bum.
Other questions will be thrown at you. I tend to just get the person very relaxed and cut up with them, while describing the job. I watch for their facial expressions as I explain the job. If they look nervous, that means they are cautious. If they look terrified, they will never make it. If they are going to let something slip that I need to know, they'll do it while they are relaxed. My technique is unusual, but for me it works. Most people think I am the easiest person in the world to interview with. But, I learn a lot.
Okay, you survived the interview. Hopefully, you didn't curse, burp, scratch yourself, tell me your ex-boss was Satan or tell me you were going to work here just long enough to get benefits and then claim work comp or get pregnant. When I stand to walk you out, stand, shake my hand again and thank me for my time. I should tell you when you will hear from me, but if I don't feel free to ask ("When will you make a decision?" is simple and easy and doesn't sound snotty. If you ask, "When will you let me know if I get the position?" might set some folks off. Not me, but some. "When will I get the job?" would even weird me out).
If you brought anything you thought was relevant to the job, ASK if they would like to see it. I had a person recently accost me with a huge binder of everything they'd ever done in their lives. Every notice of praise, every class they'd taken. I hadn't asked for it, and didn't need it. She'd never done correctional nursing, so most of her basic nursing skills were all I needed to know. Everything else is unique to corrections. It was a little uncomfortable. I had to thumb through the thing to save her feelings. It didn't make me not hire her, but it did waste my time. If she'd have asked, I'd have told her I didn't really need to see it.
After you leave, follow up in a day or two, if you haven't heard from me. By phone is best. But, if the person you interviewed with has sent you multiple emails prior to your interview, you can do email.
A lot of people recommend sending a Thank You note, but I have never sent one myself, nor received one. It's a little antiquated. But, again, it's up to you. It won't make you look bad if you do, but probably no one would notice if you didn't.
I wish I could be more helpful with this part, since it is the part that scares the bejeebers out of everyone. But, everyone interviews differently, and asks different questions.
The best advice I can give you is to be relaxed but professional. Answer questions, carry on a conversation if they seem to want you to. Don't babble. Don't bad mouth. Talk yourself up, but don't overinflate what you do or what skills you have.
If you receive notice that you did not get the job, and you wonder WHY, call up the hiring manager. Don't sound angry, and for Lord's sake, do not CRY. Just approach them in a straightforward manner. "Hi, this is Jane Doe, and I interviewed with you on April 12th. I understand you've picked another candidate. I'm still looking for a job, and I'd appreciate it if you could give me any tips that might help me down the road. Anything on my resume or during my interview that might have made me a less than ideal candidate? I really appreciate it." If someone would call me and ask that, I would be honest with them.
If you receive notice you got the job... Way To Go!!! Now, send me half your first check as a thank you.
:-)
Oh, and show up on time your first day (and pack a lunch, just in case you don't get to leave the building for lunch. I once got a job and worked 12 hours without food because I didn't know I couldn't leave and didn't want to look like a jerk asking. I was really hungry when I got out that night!!!).
Go in dressed well. I don't care if you are applying for a job that never wears dress clothes. Wear them. You don't have to have a 3 piece suit or a dress (unless you are interviewing for a job that has those as their normal dress code). But, dress nicely. Nurses wear scrubs in the vast majority of their jobs. But, you should still come dressed in dress pants and a nice shirt, at the very least. If you come in your scrubs, it better be because you just got off work. You are showing me that you respect the job and the place of employment enough to put forth some efforts. If you come in jeans, you are not making a good impression on me. If they are torn jeans, your interview is over before it started. Your hair and makeup need to be neat and understated. No peacock-like hair or night club eyeshadow.
Along with the no jeans rule, do not wear anything revealing, low-cut shirts or barely-there skirts. Nothing sheer, nothing tight. Make sure your clothes match (I do NOT have good luck with that, myself. I have worn scrubs for so long I can't even dress myself any more. That's why I wear dresses to interview. It's one piece. Add hose and the only thing I have to match are my shoes.
Oh, and let's talk about shoes. No spike heels, no hooker boots. No flip-flops. If you are wearing sandals, make sure your toenails are neat and that you do not have terrifying callouses on your feet. I worked with a woman once who had the SCARIEST feet in the world. Seriously, she practically had hooves. If I would have been interviewing her, she'd have never gotten past me with those things. Fair? No. But, seriously... feet freak me out!!!
Now, you look like a million bucks. As you are heading out the door, make sure you have your resume, any paperwork they asked you to bring or that you would like to share with the interviewer. Make sure you have a pen or twelve (what if one dries out? Be prepared!). If you use reading glasses, bring them.
Get there no more than 5 minutes early. If I tell you to be there at 10, and you are there at 9:30am, I'm going to try to not keep you waiting, so I'm going to be rushing. If I'm in a rush, I will not be as relaxed and receptive. Early is good in a lot of ways, but really early is not. If you show up late, it is the death knell for your interview, unless there has been a massive explosion and/or zombie invasion that blocked traffic. Tardiness always gets worse the longer someone works somewhere. If you cannot be there in time for the interview, I can only imagine the time your coworkers are going to be wasting waiting on you to show up. And, when your coworkers get mad, I have to listen to them complain.
When you walk in the door, greet whomever is there, nicely and professionally. With a smile. Be polite, and if they initiate small talk, work it. If you are abrupt with them, they're going to tell me after you leave. If you are rude to my happy little peeps, I will get you and your little dog, too. :-)
When you meet me, shake my hand. Now this is where it gets tricky. I've had countless talks with people who hire others, and we all agree on something. If you have a lousy handshake, you are going to have to work really hard to get past it. By a good handshake, I mean firm, but not bone-crushing. None of that limp dead-fish stuff. And, don't do that thing where you hold your hand out to me palm down. You know, as if you are offering it to me to kiss. You're not the queen or the pope. You need to extend your hand to me sideways, palm in. Hold the handshake until I start to pull away. Do NOT do that spooky thing where you hold my hand like we are prom dates. Seriously, it makes me think you are a serial killer. Likewise, do not do the double clasp. Unless you are planning to wrestle me for the job, one hand is plenty.
Wait to sit until I motion for you to, or until I sit down myself. It wouldn't bother me, but I've heard several hiring managers complain that the person came in and flopped down in a chair like they owned the place. So, go in slow! Also, don't slouch or sit like you are planning to pop out of the seat and run. Comfortable and relaxed is key.
Let me guide the conversation. Do not EVER interrupt me, or finish my sentences. Again, this isn't my pet peeve, but it is for most managers. Pause before you answer a question. Think it through.
Let the personality of the interviewer set the tone of your interview. If they are all business, do not cut up. They may have no sense of humor and are not going to appreciate yours. If they do cut up, laugh at their jokes. Not that scary, hyena laugh, just a good laugh. No matter how casual your interviewer is, do not curse or bad mouth your former employer. Don't mention drinking habits or any partying ways.
If you hated your job, and your boss was an evil zombie troll, you dont' have to pretend to love them. But, don't call them a bitch and say you hated it. Just say that you loved the type of job you did, but it wasn't challenging enough or the company seemed to have a dynamic you just didn't fit into. Or, even that you are looking to do something completely different, if you are applying for a job different than your last one.
There are a lot of standard questions you will be asked. I am so sick of them, and know that most people know they are coming, so I refuse to use them in an interview. But, most people will. So, here's the most common one:
Why are you interested in this job? This is where you indicate that you have a good understanding of both the job and the company. Tell them what you like about their company, what sounds good about the job. Tell them what you have done in the past that will help you meet that company's goals.
Why are you leaving your current job? Be honest, but nice. See above.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I'd rather eat vegetables than answer this question. I see myself as a lottery winner in Maui. But, I don't think that is what they want to hear. Seriously, why does anyone ask this? But, they do. Here is what they want to hear. They want you to tell them that you see yourself still there, but advancing yourself. Not into management or into their job (unless those are the jobs you are already applying for), but advancing in knowledge, maybe taking some classes.
What are your strengths? Hit on the key points they mentioned in the ad. If it says someone with great IV skills, point out yours. If it says you need to be proficient with MS Office, point out how much you have done with it. If the ad was vague, point out how you are always punctual, you always complete work timely, you have always had good reviews, you have good leadership skills, etc.
What are your weaknesses? This is the only question I hate more than the 5 year question. Seriously, it sucks. What kind of idiot tells you that they're weak, but that's what they are asking. Use this question to again play up your strengths. "Oh, I hate paperwork, I think most nurses do, but I am good at it!" or "I am nowhere near as comfortable with Excel as I am PowerPoint, but I actually took a class in Excel recently and am doing so much better." Even if your weakness is that you hate people and really don't ever want to work again, it's best not to mention that. Gloss over it. :-)
What kind of salary do you need (or similar)? Be honest with them, but try to hedge a little. You do not want to low-ball it. I always offer what is there, no matter if the person tells me they will take less. But, there are a lot of people who may be able to offer you $27 an hour, but will gladly give you the $16 you just told them you'd take. When they ask, you can smile and ask, "You know, I've been out of the market for a while, I'm not even sure what the going rate is for my position. What do you usually start people out at for this job?" But, if they push you, tell them what you really have to have. You cannot take the job for less than you need, so don't offer to do so.
Do you have any questions? You think this should be easy. It isn't. You should have questions. There is no way that I took 30 or 45 minutes and told you everything you should know about the job. Ask me how long orientation is. Ask me how many offices we have. Ask me something that makes you sound intelligent. Do not ask me about how long you have to be there before you can take vacation or how liberal our casual Friday policy is. Don't ask me what our policy is on workplace romance. It's a business, not e-Harmony. Don't ask questions that make you sound like an idiot or a lazy bum.
Other questions will be thrown at you. I tend to just get the person very relaxed and cut up with them, while describing the job. I watch for their facial expressions as I explain the job. If they look nervous, that means they are cautious. If they look terrified, they will never make it. If they are going to let something slip that I need to know, they'll do it while they are relaxed. My technique is unusual, but for me it works. Most people think I am the easiest person in the world to interview with. But, I learn a lot.
Okay, you survived the interview. Hopefully, you didn't curse, burp, scratch yourself, tell me your ex-boss was Satan or tell me you were going to work here just long enough to get benefits and then claim work comp or get pregnant. When I stand to walk you out, stand, shake my hand again and thank me for my time. I should tell you when you will hear from me, but if I don't feel free to ask ("When will you make a decision?" is simple and easy and doesn't sound snotty. If you ask, "When will you let me know if I get the position?" might set some folks off. Not me, but some. "When will I get the job?" would even weird me out).
If you brought anything you thought was relevant to the job, ASK if they would like to see it. I had a person recently accost me with a huge binder of everything they'd ever done in their lives. Every notice of praise, every class they'd taken. I hadn't asked for it, and didn't need it. She'd never done correctional nursing, so most of her basic nursing skills were all I needed to know. Everything else is unique to corrections. It was a little uncomfortable. I had to thumb through the thing to save her feelings. It didn't make me not hire her, but it did waste my time. If she'd have asked, I'd have told her I didn't really need to see it.
After you leave, follow up in a day or two, if you haven't heard from me. By phone is best. But, if the person you interviewed with has sent you multiple emails prior to your interview, you can do email.
A lot of people recommend sending a Thank You note, but I have never sent one myself, nor received one. It's a little antiquated. But, again, it's up to you. It won't make you look bad if you do, but probably no one would notice if you didn't.
I wish I could be more helpful with this part, since it is the part that scares the bejeebers out of everyone. But, everyone interviews differently, and asks different questions.
The best advice I can give you is to be relaxed but professional. Answer questions, carry on a conversation if they seem to want you to. Don't babble. Don't bad mouth. Talk yourself up, but don't overinflate what you do or what skills you have.
If you receive notice that you did not get the job, and you wonder WHY, call up the hiring manager. Don't sound angry, and for Lord's sake, do not CRY. Just approach them in a straightforward manner. "Hi, this is Jane Doe, and I interviewed with you on April 12th. I understand you've picked another candidate. I'm still looking for a job, and I'd appreciate it if you could give me any tips that might help me down the road. Anything on my resume or during my interview that might have made me a less than ideal candidate? I really appreciate it." If someone would call me and ask that, I would be honest with them.
If you receive notice you got the job... Way To Go!!! Now, send me half your first check as a thank you.
:-)
Oh, and show up on time your first day (and pack a lunch, just in case you don't get to leave the building for lunch. I once got a job and worked 12 hours without food because I didn't know I couldn't leave and didn't want to look like a jerk asking. I was really hungry when I got out that night!!!).
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