We can be heroes...

"I, I will be king
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can be Heroes, just for one day
We can be us, just for one day"
-"Heroes" by David Bowie


My friend Charles posted a question on his Facebook today. It's one I've probably given a few seconds thought here and there through the years, but never really sat down and given deep consideration. 


"Who inspires you?"  


i thought about this all day today, off and on. As we all know, I have the attention span of a gnat, so that is how I think... off and on. So, it's been stewing in my brain, trying to figure out who inspires me. And, while that stew was cooking, another little thought, a side dish I suppose, was also baking...


"Who is your hero?"


I've always had a incredibly active imagination. I create whole worlds inside my head. I have made several attempts at writing them down, but due to the ADD thing... never works. I'm much better suited to short bits of writing like this. But, in those worlds, I am sometimes a hero. Not the kind with tights and a cape, just the kind with a good idea, and a helping hand. I win the lottery and help people who are down on their luck. I plan an entire building out just to distribute food to the needy. I revitalize a neglected downtown. In my little world I don't do it for recognition. Even in the real world, I don't do nice things then put up the neon arrow saying "Come here to praise me for what I did today!" I do the nice things because they make me feel good, and because sometimes people just need someone to be nice. I just wish I could do more of them in the real world, rather than the one in my head. 


So, I realized that my heroes, idols and inspirations are the people who I model my other-worldly self after. The quiet heroes. The people who help and never tell anyone. The ones who quietly step in and make the world better and then quietly step out, often with no recognition. 


I remember long-lost friend coming to see me in the hospital and bringing his family photo albums. I didn't know his family at all. But, he wove these wonderful stories about his family, like a vivid tapestry. He got me so involved in the stories that I forgot to be scared and forgot how very badly I hurt. He didn't see it as doing a big thing, never expected the thanks I gave him. He just wanted to make me feel better. That is a hero to me. No cape, no tights.


I remember another time when I honestly thought my world was coming to an end. It was high school. I was the typical overly-dramatic drama queen teenage girl, but the problem felt so real to me. I hit a point in my life where I knew I could not continue a relationship and had to end it, but was so afraid of what I would be WITHOUT that relationship that it terrified me. I was stuck. And, I was scared, disappointed in myself and downright depressed. I reached out to one of my best friends and he dropped everything, came to see me and gave me some painful advice. He rubbed my back while I cried and held my hair while I puked and then made me get on the phone and end the relationship. Then repeated all the above steps after I did what had to be done. He also brought me gummy bears. Again, no cape, no tights, no article in the paper singing his praises, but he was my hero.


My friend Heather drove me home, so I could cry and hold my cat when I was told I had to put him to sleep. My husband carried 3 handkerchiefs to my Aunt Sandy's funeral, and again to my Uncle Ronnie's funeral, because he knew I never remember Kleenex and knew I would cry. 


I could make lists and lists. But, I've babbled far too much. 


I've never had a need for someone to swoop in with super-human strength and save me from a speeding train. I've never needed someone to whisk me out of a dangerous situation. So, maybe my idea of hero is different than others. But, the heroes that I know have made my life easier, more bearable. They have shaped who I am, in a positive way. They've saved me from pain, fear and most often and importantly, they've saved me from myself. 


So, who inspires me? Who are my heroes? They are my friends, my family, my husband, my coworkers. They are the people who tell me it will be okay. The people who lead by example and SHOW me it will be okay. They are the people who take the risks to be what I need at that moment. 


And, in my head, they have a cape, maybe even tights. And, they have my praise and eternal gratitude. It's not a bat signal, but it's the best I have.