Ah, spring time. April showers bring May flowers. Oh, and panic attacks. Yeah, they don't bloom, they just show up, unannounced and uninvited. They just sneak up on you in the middle of the night, or while you're sitting at your desk and make you feel as if, for no reason, you need to get up and RUN.
Your heart pounds, your pupils dilate, you break out in a sweat. You feel like there is an elephant on your chest. Impending doom? Check! Pure terror? Check! Mortal embarrassment if you are doing all of this in public? Check!
For whatever reason, my panic attacks are always worse when it rains, and especially when it storms. I've tracked it and it seems to be whenever there are large changes in barometric pressure. Why this would impact a chemical imbalance, I have no idea. But, it gives me a little head's up, but not always. 90% of the time, the rain doesn't mean a panic attack, so I'm braced to fight... and nothing happens. But, that 10% is so fun. That's sarcasm, if you don't know that.
And, currently this is much worse. Because my stupid insurance decided that paying for Lexapro, the antidepressant I've had EXCELLENT results with for over 3 years, is too expensive. So, they made me change to either Zoloft or Celexa. I've already tried Celexa and it made me so lethargic. I didn't want to do anything. So, that wasn't an option. So, what choice do I have? Zoloft.
It seemed to work for a while, but about the time it should have been getting therapeutic, I noticed an odd little side effect...
I'm chewing the inside of my mouth. I don't mean a little, I mean a lot. Right now, my lips are actually swollen because of it. What the heck?? Being crazy wasn't quite enough? I have to do this, too? Really? And, tonight, I can feel a panic attack coming. I'll take something to ward it off, which will result in me being in a rotten mood tomorrow (consider yourself warned, coworkers) and not sleeping well.
So, to sum up, tomorrow I will be cranky, sleepy, swollen-mouthed and crazy. Wow, isn't this fun?!
Ugh.
Anyway, I'll call my doctor tomorrow and tell him despite the best efforts I could possibly make, I can't do the Zoloft. Then, we will go into a period of intense fighting with my insurance company. I can scarcely wait! Eventually, I will get permission from the insurance to go back on Lexapro. Again. Which I shouldn't have quit taking, because it worked. But, since it cost them extra money, hey... what's my discomfort? Nothing, to them!
I promise, when I am not all in pain, cranky and crazy, I will do a fun and/or funny blog. Soon, if I get my CRAZY pills back. LOL!!
Until then, just enjoy the mental image of me all poof-mouthed and pacing. I'm a Poofy-pacer! *snort*
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Interviewing: the scary part, with Auntie Em
Well, your concisely written resume (which, along with your cover letter was customized for each place you sent it, right??) and your accurately completed application have landed you the interview. This is the part that makes the vast majority of people want to throw up. There will be weird questions that throw you off. There will be someone you have never met, with whom you have to carry on a conversation and convince you are exactly what they want (and seem friendly, but not too friendly. Professional but not aloof. Perfect, but not better than the interviewer). Honestly, just typing this makes me queasy, and I am really good at being interviewed. I have never interviewed for a job and not gotten it (well, with the exception of the one interview I walked out on. And, yes, I told you not to do that, but hey... do as I say, okay?). I'm going to give you information I've gleaned from both sides of the desk, both as interviewer of hundreds and she who has had over 13 jobs (and interviewed for many more than that).
Go in dressed well. I don't care if you are applying for a job that never wears dress clothes. Wear them. You don't have to have a 3 piece suit or a dress (unless you are interviewing for a job that has those as their normal dress code). But, dress nicely. Nurses wear scrubs in the vast majority of their jobs. But, you should still come dressed in dress pants and a nice shirt, at the very least. If you come in your scrubs, it better be because you just got off work. You are showing me that you respect the job and the place of employment enough to put forth some efforts. If you come in jeans, you are not making a good impression on me. If they are torn jeans, your interview is over before it started. Your hair and makeup need to be neat and understated. No peacock-like hair or night club eyeshadow.
Along with the no jeans rule, do not wear anything revealing, low-cut shirts or barely-there skirts. Nothing sheer, nothing tight. Make sure your clothes match (I do NOT have good luck with that, myself. I have worn scrubs for so long I can't even dress myself any more. That's why I wear dresses to interview. It's one piece. Add hose and the only thing I have to match are my shoes.
Oh, and let's talk about shoes. No spike heels, no hooker boots. No flip-flops. If you are wearing sandals, make sure your toenails are neat and that you do not have terrifying callouses on your feet. I worked with a woman once who had the SCARIEST feet in the world. Seriously, she practically had hooves. If I would have been interviewing her, she'd have never gotten past me with those things. Fair? No. But, seriously... feet freak me out!!!
Now, you look like a million bucks. As you are heading out the door, make sure you have your resume, any paperwork they asked you to bring or that you would like to share with the interviewer. Make sure you have a pen or twelve (what if one dries out? Be prepared!). If you use reading glasses, bring them.
Get there no more than 5 minutes early. If I tell you to be there at 10, and you are there at 9:30am, I'm going to try to not keep you waiting, so I'm going to be rushing. If I'm in a rush, I will not be as relaxed and receptive. Early is good in a lot of ways, but really early is not. If you show up late, it is the death knell for your interview, unless there has been a massive explosion and/or zombie invasion that blocked traffic. Tardiness always gets worse the longer someone works somewhere. If you cannot be there in time for the interview, I can only imagine the time your coworkers are going to be wasting waiting on you to show up. And, when your coworkers get mad, I have to listen to them complain.
When you walk in the door, greet whomever is there, nicely and professionally. With a smile. Be polite, and if they initiate small talk, work it. If you are abrupt with them, they're going to tell me after you leave. If you are rude to my happy little peeps, I will get you and your little dog, too. :-)
When you meet me, shake my hand. Now this is where it gets tricky. I've had countless talks with people who hire others, and we all agree on something. If you have a lousy handshake, you are going to have to work really hard to get past it. By a good handshake, I mean firm, but not bone-crushing. None of that limp dead-fish stuff. And, don't do that thing where you hold your hand out to me palm down. You know, as if you are offering it to me to kiss. You're not the queen or the pope. You need to extend your hand to me sideways, palm in. Hold the handshake until I start to pull away. Do NOT do that spooky thing where you hold my hand like we are prom dates. Seriously, it makes me think you are a serial killer. Likewise, do not do the double clasp. Unless you are planning to wrestle me for the job, one hand is plenty.
Wait to sit until I motion for you to, or until I sit down myself. It wouldn't bother me, but I've heard several hiring managers complain that the person came in and flopped down in a chair like they owned the place. So, go in slow! Also, don't slouch or sit like you are planning to pop out of the seat and run. Comfortable and relaxed is key.
Let me guide the conversation. Do not EVER interrupt me, or finish my sentences. Again, this isn't my pet peeve, but it is for most managers. Pause before you answer a question. Think it through.
Let the personality of the interviewer set the tone of your interview. If they are all business, do not cut up. They may have no sense of humor and are not going to appreciate yours. If they do cut up, laugh at their jokes. Not that scary, hyena laugh, just a good laugh. No matter how casual your interviewer is, do not curse or bad mouth your former employer. Don't mention drinking habits or any partying ways.
If you hated your job, and your boss was an evil zombie troll, you dont' have to pretend to love them. But, don't call them a bitch and say you hated it. Just say that you loved the type of job you did, but it wasn't challenging enough or the company seemed to have a dynamic you just didn't fit into. Or, even that you are looking to do something completely different, if you are applying for a job different than your last one.
There are a lot of standard questions you will be asked. I am so sick of them, and know that most people know they are coming, so I refuse to use them in an interview. But, most people will. So, here's the most common one:
Why are you interested in this job? This is where you indicate that you have a good understanding of both the job and the company. Tell them what you like about their company, what sounds good about the job. Tell them what you have done in the past that will help you meet that company's goals.
Why are you leaving your current job? Be honest, but nice. See above.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I'd rather eat vegetables than answer this question. I see myself as a lottery winner in Maui. But, I don't think that is what they want to hear. Seriously, why does anyone ask this? But, they do. Here is what they want to hear. They want you to tell them that you see yourself still there, but advancing yourself. Not into management or into their job (unless those are the jobs you are already applying for), but advancing in knowledge, maybe taking some classes.
What are your strengths? Hit on the key points they mentioned in the ad. If it says someone with great IV skills, point out yours. If it says you need to be proficient with MS Office, point out how much you have done with it. If the ad was vague, point out how you are always punctual, you always complete work timely, you have always had good reviews, you have good leadership skills, etc.
What are your weaknesses? This is the only question I hate more than the 5 year question. Seriously, it sucks. What kind of idiot tells you that they're weak, but that's what they are asking. Use this question to again play up your strengths. "Oh, I hate paperwork, I think most nurses do, but I am good at it!" or "I am nowhere near as comfortable with Excel as I am PowerPoint, but I actually took a class in Excel recently and am doing so much better." Even if your weakness is that you hate people and really don't ever want to work again, it's best not to mention that. Gloss over it. :-)
What kind of salary do you need (or similar)? Be honest with them, but try to hedge a little. You do not want to low-ball it. I always offer what is there, no matter if the person tells me they will take less. But, there are a lot of people who may be able to offer you $27 an hour, but will gladly give you the $16 you just told them you'd take. When they ask, you can smile and ask, "You know, I've been out of the market for a while, I'm not even sure what the going rate is for my position. What do you usually start people out at for this job?" But, if they push you, tell them what you really have to have. You cannot take the job for less than you need, so don't offer to do so.
Do you have any questions? You think this should be easy. It isn't. You should have questions. There is no way that I took 30 or 45 minutes and told you everything you should know about the job. Ask me how long orientation is. Ask me how many offices we have. Ask me something that makes you sound intelligent. Do not ask me about how long you have to be there before you can take vacation or how liberal our casual Friday policy is. Don't ask me what our policy is on workplace romance. It's a business, not e-Harmony. Don't ask questions that make you sound like an idiot or a lazy bum.
Other questions will be thrown at you. I tend to just get the person very relaxed and cut up with them, while describing the job. I watch for their facial expressions as I explain the job. If they look nervous, that means they are cautious. If they look terrified, they will never make it. If they are going to let something slip that I need to know, they'll do it while they are relaxed. My technique is unusual, but for me it works. Most people think I am the easiest person in the world to interview with. But, I learn a lot.
Okay, you survived the interview. Hopefully, you didn't curse, burp, scratch yourself, tell me your ex-boss was Satan or tell me you were going to work here just long enough to get benefits and then claim work comp or get pregnant. When I stand to walk you out, stand, shake my hand again and thank me for my time. I should tell you when you will hear from me, but if I don't feel free to ask ("When will you make a decision?" is simple and easy and doesn't sound snotty. If you ask, "When will you let me know if I get the position?" might set some folks off. Not me, but some. "When will I get the job?" would even weird me out).
If you brought anything you thought was relevant to the job, ASK if they would like to see it. I had a person recently accost me with a huge binder of everything they'd ever done in their lives. Every notice of praise, every class they'd taken. I hadn't asked for it, and didn't need it. She'd never done correctional nursing, so most of her basic nursing skills were all I needed to know. Everything else is unique to corrections. It was a little uncomfortable. I had to thumb through the thing to save her feelings. It didn't make me not hire her, but it did waste my time. If she'd have asked, I'd have told her I didn't really need to see it.
After you leave, follow up in a day or two, if you haven't heard from me. By phone is best. But, if the person you interviewed with has sent you multiple emails prior to your interview, you can do email.
A lot of people recommend sending a Thank You note, but I have never sent one myself, nor received one. It's a little antiquated. But, again, it's up to you. It won't make you look bad if you do, but probably no one would notice if you didn't.
I wish I could be more helpful with this part, since it is the part that scares the bejeebers out of everyone. But, everyone interviews differently, and asks different questions.
The best advice I can give you is to be relaxed but professional. Answer questions, carry on a conversation if they seem to want you to. Don't babble. Don't bad mouth. Talk yourself up, but don't overinflate what you do or what skills you have.
If you receive notice that you did not get the job, and you wonder WHY, call up the hiring manager. Don't sound angry, and for Lord's sake, do not CRY. Just approach them in a straightforward manner. "Hi, this is Jane Doe, and I interviewed with you on April 12th. I understand you've picked another candidate. I'm still looking for a job, and I'd appreciate it if you could give me any tips that might help me down the road. Anything on my resume or during my interview that might have made me a less than ideal candidate? I really appreciate it." If someone would call me and ask that, I would be honest with them.
If you receive notice you got the job... Way To Go!!! Now, send me half your first check as a thank you.
:-)
Oh, and show up on time your first day (and pack a lunch, just in case you don't get to leave the building for lunch. I once got a job and worked 12 hours without food because I didn't know I couldn't leave and didn't want to look like a jerk asking. I was really hungry when I got out that night!!!).
Go in dressed well. I don't care if you are applying for a job that never wears dress clothes. Wear them. You don't have to have a 3 piece suit or a dress (unless you are interviewing for a job that has those as their normal dress code). But, dress nicely. Nurses wear scrubs in the vast majority of their jobs. But, you should still come dressed in dress pants and a nice shirt, at the very least. If you come in your scrubs, it better be because you just got off work. You are showing me that you respect the job and the place of employment enough to put forth some efforts. If you come in jeans, you are not making a good impression on me. If they are torn jeans, your interview is over before it started. Your hair and makeup need to be neat and understated. No peacock-like hair or night club eyeshadow.
Along with the no jeans rule, do not wear anything revealing, low-cut shirts or barely-there skirts. Nothing sheer, nothing tight. Make sure your clothes match (I do NOT have good luck with that, myself. I have worn scrubs for so long I can't even dress myself any more. That's why I wear dresses to interview. It's one piece. Add hose and the only thing I have to match are my shoes.
Oh, and let's talk about shoes. No spike heels, no hooker boots. No flip-flops. If you are wearing sandals, make sure your toenails are neat and that you do not have terrifying callouses on your feet. I worked with a woman once who had the SCARIEST feet in the world. Seriously, she practically had hooves. If I would have been interviewing her, she'd have never gotten past me with those things. Fair? No. But, seriously... feet freak me out!!!
Now, you look like a million bucks. As you are heading out the door, make sure you have your resume, any paperwork they asked you to bring or that you would like to share with the interviewer. Make sure you have a pen or twelve (what if one dries out? Be prepared!). If you use reading glasses, bring them.
Get there no more than 5 minutes early. If I tell you to be there at 10, and you are there at 9:30am, I'm going to try to not keep you waiting, so I'm going to be rushing. If I'm in a rush, I will not be as relaxed and receptive. Early is good in a lot of ways, but really early is not. If you show up late, it is the death knell for your interview, unless there has been a massive explosion and/or zombie invasion that blocked traffic. Tardiness always gets worse the longer someone works somewhere. If you cannot be there in time for the interview, I can only imagine the time your coworkers are going to be wasting waiting on you to show up. And, when your coworkers get mad, I have to listen to them complain.
When you walk in the door, greet whomever is there, nicely and professionally. With a smile. Be polite, and if they initiate small talk, work it. If you are abrupt with them, they're going to tell me after you leave. If you are rude to my happy little peeps, I will get you and your little dog, too. :-)
When you meet me, shake my hand. Now this is where it gets tricky. I've had countless talks with people who hire others, and we all agree on something. If you have a lousy handshake, you are going to have to work really hard to get past it. By a good handshake, I mean firm, but not bone-crushing. None of that limp dead-fish stuff. And, don't do that thing where you hold your hand out to me palm down. You know, as if you are offering it to me to kiss. You're not the queen or the pope. You need to extend your hand to me sideways, palm in. Hold the handshake until I start to pull away. Do NOT do that spooky thing where you hold my hand like we are prom dates. Seriously, it makes me think you are a serial killer. Likewise, do not do the double clasp. Unless you are planning to wrestle me for the job, one hand is plenty.
Wait to sit until I motion for you to, or until I sit down myself. It wouldn't bother me, but I've heard several hiring managers complain that the person came in and flopped down in a chair like they owned the place. So, go in slow! Also, don't slouch or sit like you are planning to pop out of the seat and run. Comfortable and relaxed is key.
Let me guide the conversation. Do not EVER interrupt me, or finish my sentences. Again, this isn't my pet peeve, but it is for most managers. Pause before you answer a question. Think it through.
Let the personality of the interviewer set the tone of your interview. If they are all business, do not cut up. They may have no sense of humor and are not going to appreciate yours. If they do cut up, laugh at their jokes. Not that scary, hyena laugh, just a good laugh. No matter how casual your interviewer is, do not curse or bad mouth your former employer. Don't mention drinking habits or any partying ways.
If you hated your job, and your boss was an evil zombie troll, you dont' have to pretend to love them. But, don't call them a bitch and say you hated it. Just say that you loved the type of job you did, but it wasn't challenging enough or the company seemed to have a dynamic you just didn't fit into. Or, even that you are looking to do something completely different, if you are applying for a job different than your last one.
There are a lot of standard questions you will be asked. I am so sick of them, and know that most people know they are coming, so I refuse to use them in an interview. But, most people will. So, here's the most common one:
Why are you interested in this job? This is where you indicate that you have a good understanding of both the job and the company. Tell them what you like about their company, what sounds good about the job. Tell them what you have done in the past that will help you meet that company's goals.
Why are you leaving your current job? Be honest, but nice. See above.
Where do you see yourself in 5 years? I'd rather eat vegetables than answer this question. I see myself as a lottery winner in Maui. But, I don't think that is what they want to hear. Seriously, why does anyone ask this? But, they do. Here is what they want to hear. They want you to tell them that you see yourself still there, but advancing yourself. Not into management or into their job (unless those are the jobs you are already applying for), but advancing in knowledge, maybe taking some classes.
What are your strengths? Hit on the key points they mentioned in the ad. If it says someone with great IV skills, point out yours. If it says you need to be proficient with MS Office, point out how much you have done with it. If the ad was vague, point out how you are always punctual, you always complete work timely, you have always had good reviews, you have good leadership skills, etc.
What are your weaknesses? This is the only question I hate more than the 5 year question. Seriously, it sucks. What kind of idiot tells you that they're weak, but that's what they are asking. Use this question to again play up your strengths. "Oh, I hate paperwork, I think most nurses do, but I am good at it!" or "I am nowhere near as comfortable with Excel as I am PowerPoint, but I actually took a class in Excel recently and am doing so much better." Even if your weakness is that you hate people and really don't ever want to work again, it's best not to mention that. Gloss over it. :-)
What kind of salary do you need (or similar)? Be honest with them, but try to hedge a little. You do not want to low-ball it. I always offer what is there, no matter if the person tells me they will take less. But, there are a lot of people who may be able to offer you $27 an hour, but will gladly give you the $16 you just told them you'd take. When they ask, you can smile and ask, "You know, I've been out of the market for a while, I'm not even sure what the going rate is for my position. What do you usually start people out at for this job?" But, if they push you, tell them what you really have to have. You cannot take the job for less than you need, so don't offer to do so.
Do you have any questions? You think this should be easy. It isn't. You should have questions. There is no way that I took 30 or 45 minutes and told you everything you should know about the job. Ask me how long orientation is. Ask me how many offices we have. Ask me something that makes you sound intelligent. Do not ask me about how long you have to be there before you can take vacation or how liberal our casual Friday policy is. Don't ask me what our policy is on workplace romance. It's a business, not e-Harmony. Don't ask questions that make you sound like an idiot or a lazy bum.
Other questions will be thrown at you. I tend to just get the person very relaxed and cut up with them, while describing the job. I watch for their facial expressions as I explain the job. If they look nervous, that means they are cautious. If they look terrified, they will never make it. If they are going to let something slip that I need to know, they'll do it while they are relaxed. My technique is unusual, but for me it works. Most people think I am the easiest person in the world to interview with. But, I learn a lot.
Okay, you survived the interview. Hopefully, you didn't curse, burp, scratch yourself, tell me your ex-boss was Satan or tell me you were going to work here just long enough to get benefits and then claim work comp or get pregnant. When I stand to walk you out, stand, shake my hand again and thank me for my time. I should tell you when you will hear from me, but if I don't feel free to ask ("When will you make a decision?" is simple and easy and doesn't sound snotty. If you ask, "When will you let me know if I get the position?" might set some folks off. Not me, but some. "When will I get the job?" would even weird me out).
If you brought anything you thought was relevant to the job, ASK if they would like to see it. I had a person recently accost me with a huge binder of everything they'd ever done in their lives. Every notice of praise, every class they'd taken. I hadn't asked for it, and didn't need it. She'd never done correctional nursing, so most of her basic nursing skills were all I needed to know. Everything else is unique to corrections. It was a little uncomfortable. I had to thumb through the thing to save her feelings. It didn't make me not hire her, but it did waste my time. If she'd have asked, I'd have told her I didn't really need to see it.
After you leave, follow up in a day or two, if you haven't heard from me. By phone is best. But, if the person you interviewed with has sent you multiple emails prior to your interview, you can do email.
A lot of people recommend sending a Thank You note, but I have never sent one myself, nor received one. It's a little antiquated. But, again, it's up to you. It won't make you look bad if you do, but probably no one would notice if you didn't.
I wish I could be more helpful with this part, since it is the part that scares the bejeebers out of everyone. But, everyone interviews differently, and asks different questions.
The best advice I can give you is to be relaxed but professional. Answer questions, carry on a conversation if they seem to want you to. Don't babble. Don't bad mouth. Talk yourself up, but don't overinflate what you do or what skills you have.
If you receive notice that you did not get the job, and you wonder WHY, call up the hiring manager. Don't sound angry, and for Lord's sake, do not CRY. Just approach them in a straightforward manner. "Hi, this is Jane Doe, and I interviewed with you on April 12th. I understand you've picked another candidate. I'm still looking for a job, and I'd appreciate it if you could give me any tips that might help me down the road. Anything on my resume or during my interview that might have made me a less than ideal candidate? I really appreciate it." If someone would call me and ask that, I would be honest with them.
If you receive notice you got the job... Way To Go!!! Now, send me half your first check as a thank you.
:-)
Oh, and show up on time your first day (and pack a lunch, just in case you don't get to leave the building for lunch. I once got a job and worked 12 hours without food because I didn't know I couldn't leave and didn't want to look like a jerk asking. I was really hungry when I got out that night!!!).
More Job Tips from Auntie Em
OK, here's the next stop... you go and fill out an application. How hard can it be, right?? You'd be surprised.
First of all, READ the application all the way through and follow the directions PERFECTLY. If the application says you must attach proof of something (for instance, a copy of your high school transcript), then do it. Don't think you'll bring it in later or if you think that you don't have to do it. They will throw your application into the "No way" pile. If you can't follow instructions while you are trying to impress them, chances are you are going to suck at following them when you've been there a while.
Do NOT leave a blank, unless it is absolutely necessary. Write "not applicable" or even the short form "NA" if you have to. If there is something less than favorable you have to list, such as reason for leaving and you were fired, Do not give into the temptation to write something there such as "I'll explain later" or "I'll explain in person". When I see these, ti is never a good sign. Usually I get some completely insane explanation to go with it. Or, I figure out within 2 seconds why they got fired. Due to this happening often, you start to assume when you see those phrases that you are dealing with a loser. People get fired more than you know. It doesn't automatically throw you out of the running. List that you were fired and maybe put something to the side as a short (but again,honest) explanation. Fired: did not meet sales quota or Fired: not related to performance. At least it shows you are honest and aren't hiding the whole firing thing. Chances are you can explain during your interview.
Make sure your application is legible and that your information matches that of your resume (sometimes I saw people with totally different dates of employment from their resume). Always make sure to bring your resume to fill out the application, that way they match. Make sure to list your phone numbers and emails that are the best and easiest ways to contact you.
If there is a place to put your work history (and there almost always is), do not think attaching your resume will cover that. Yes, it's duplication of information, but you're trying to impress. If you are too lazy to fill in 3 blanks about where you worked, you're way too lazy for me to hire. Ditto if it says to use a separate sheet listing other jobs (for example when you have 3 blanks on the application and have had 6 jobs). Do it!
As with your resume, be honest. Make sure that you are honest. If you will absolutely, positively NOT willing to do night shift, do not list "available for all shifts." You will just waste the interviewer's time if they are hiring for nights. Specify in the cover letter of your resume (you did send a cover letter, didn't you??) that you are willing to work weekends or holidays, etc. to make up for your ability to only work a certain shift. If you look flexible, they are more likely to remember you the next day shift opening they have!
If you are allowed to fill out the application somewhere other than on-site, take advantage of that. Take it home, take your time and have someone proof-read it. Do not turn it in until you have everything they ask for attached. Do not attach extras (you can bring anything pertinent to your interview). Do exactly what the application says and don't add things.
Use a black pen to fill out your application (or a blue one, if you must. But never, ever, ever use a red or colored pen. It's like the colored paper. Bad idea). Make sure you sign it.
Oh, and don't come in and ask me for an application and then ask me for a pen. Seriously, you're there to get a job and know you're going to be filling out an application. If you didn't figure that would involve a pen, then I'm putting you in the mental midget category, even as a smile and hand you the pen. Trust me, I'll use the pen later, to mark your app as unacceptable!
Next up: Interviewing!
First of all, READ the application all the way through and follow the directions PERFECTLY. If the application says you must attach proof of something (for instance, a copy of your high school transcript), then do it. Don't think you'll bring it in later or if you think that you don't have to do it. They will throw your application into the "No way" pile. If you can't follow instructions while you are trying to impress them, chances are you are going to suck at following them when you've been there a while.
Do NOT leave a blank, unless it is absolutely necessary. Write "not applicable" or even the short form "NA" if you have to. If there is something less than favorable you have to list, such as reason for leaving and you were fired, Do not give into the temptation to write something there such as "I'll explain later" or "I'll explain in person". When I see these, ti is never a good sign. Usually I get some completely insane explanation to go with it. Or, I figure out within 2 seconds why they got fired. Due to this happening often, you start to assume when you see those phrases that you are dealing with a loser. People get fired more than you know. It doesn't automatically throw you out of the running. List that you were fired and maybe put something to the side as a short (but again,honest) explanation. Fired: did not meet sales quota or Fired: not related to performance. At least it shows you are honest and aren't hiding the whole firing thing. Chances are you can explain during your interview.
Make sure your application is legible and that your information matches that of your resume (sometimes I saw people with totally different dates of employment from their resume). Always make sure to bring your resume to fill out the application, that way they match. Make sure to list your phone numbers and emails that are the best and easiest ways to contact you.
If there is a place to put your work history (and there almost always is), do not think attaching your resume will cover that. Yes, it's duplication of information, but you're trying to impress. If you are too lazy to fill in 3 blanks about where you worked, you're way too lazy for me to hire. Ditto if it says to use a separate sheet listing other jobs (for example when you have 3 blanks on the application and have had 6 jobs). Do it!
As with your resume, be honest. Make sure that you are honest. If you will absolutely, positively NOT willing to do night shift, do not list "available for all shifts." You will just waste the interviewer's time if they are hiring for nights. Specify in the cover letter of your resume (you did send a cover letter, didn't you??) that you are willing to work weekends or holidays, etc. to make up for your ability to only work a certain shift. If you look flexible, they are more likely to remember you the next day shift opening they have!
If you are allowed to fill out the application somewhere other than on-site, take advantage of that. Take it home, take your time and have someone proof-read it. Do not turn it in until you have everything they ask for attached. Do not attach extras (you can bring anything pertinent to your interview). Do exactly what the application says and don't add things.
Use a black pen to fill out your application (or a blue one, if you must. But never, ever, ever use a red or colored pen. It's like the colored paper. Bad idea). Make sure you sign it.
Oh, and don't come in and ask me for an application and then ask me for a pen. Seriously, you're there to get a job and know you're going to be filling out an application. If you didn't figure that would involve a pen, then I'm putting you in the mental midget category, even as a smile and hand you the pen. Trust me, I'll use the pen later, to mark your app as unacceptable!
Next up: Interviewing!
Saturday, March 12, 2011
Job Hunting Tips from Your Auntie Em
I have hired and fired a large number of people throughout the years. Both as an HR-ish person for a temp agency (we hired everything from clerical personnel to substitute teachers, to factory workers to people to hand out Jelly Belly candies at the races.
I have seen resumes that ran the gamut from horrible to hilarious to works of art. I have had a man look me in the eyes and tell me he has never been arrested, then as he walked down the hall, I could see his ankle monitoring bracelet! I've had people walk out in the middle of interviews and I have had people answer a cell phone during an interview.
I have wondered so many times what on earth people are thinking. Then, I realize how very little solid advice there is out there for interviews and applications. It is amazing to me that so many articles exist telling you how to dress, but so few telling you to watch your email address. So, here's a few thoughts I've had rattling around in my brain for a long time about job searching.
I have wondered so many times what on earth people are thinking. Then, I realize how very little solid advice there is out there for interviews and applications. It is amazing to me that so many articles exist telling you how to dress, but so few telling you to watch your email address. So, here's a few thoughts I've had rattling around in my brain for a long time about job searching.
Today, we are going to talk about resumes. These get you through the door. They are the first impression. Most people see your resume before they ever see or hear you. And, to be honest, we look at them for less than 5 minutes. If you pass that, we'll look more in depth. But, most resumes are chucked into the "NEVER" file in that first 5 minutes. So, work it to your advantage. You will NEVER get in the door with a crappy resume.
Physically, unless you are applying for a job in the arts, do not use colored paper. Some moron gave the advice a few years back to use bright paper or colored ink to "catch the attention:" of the hiring manager. If I see a pink piece of paper, I assume you are still in middle school and have never had a real job in your life. I do not even LOOK at your resume. It goes in the trash. Similarly, use a normal font. Times New Roman or maybe Arial. Same size throughout the resume.
If you have an unprofessional sounding email, make a new one just for your resume. Gmail accounts will automatically forward to your regular email account if you'd like. What is an unprofessional email? Anything that makes you sound like you party 24/7 (nursingbabe89 is a recent one that comes to mind), that makes you sound crazy (alienabductee72 and no I'm not kidding), that gives away your ethnicity, sex, marital status, etc. (yes, it is illegal to discriminate against you for these things, but some people are jerks and will anyway. Don't make it easy for them by having an email of marriedblackguy545). Pick an email that makes no assumptions. Your names is a good one (Ralph.W.Doe@whatever.com). Do NOT use the email you have from your current job. Because when I see that, I know you are searching for your job on company time. I know that you will do the same when you work for me.
Keep the resume to one page. You can attach references or even extra info, but if your resume is more than a page, you go to the bottom of my pile. I don't have time to pick thru how many spelling bees you won in 3rd grade or to see that you were lead doughnut seller in your first job 17 years ago. Give me at least the past 3 jobs you've had (whether or not they are related to the one you are applying for) and then any that you feel have to do with the job you are applying for.
If your resume is 11 pages long and lists every single thing you did at your job, I will get bored. You will go to the bottom of the pile. And, in the depths of my little brain, I assume you are completely full. Either of yourself or of crap. Either way, I don't like you and your huge resume. And, unless I have hit a high level of desperation, I will not be calling you.
If you have an unprofessional sounding email, make a new one just for your resume. Gmail accounts will automatically forward to your regular email account if you'd like. What is an unprofessional email? Anything that makes you sound like you party 24/7 (nursingbabe89 is a recent one that comes to mind), that makes you sound crazy (alienabductee72 and no I'm not kidding), that gives away your ethnicity, sex, marital status, etc. (yes, it is illegal to discriminate against you for these things, but some people are jerks and will anyway. Don't make it easy for them by having an email of marriedblackguy545). Pick an email that makes no assumptions. Your names is a good one (Ralph.W.Doe@whatever.com). Do NOT use the email you have from your current job. Because when I see that, I know you are searching for your job on company time. I know that you will do the same when you work for me.
Your phone number is very important. Most likely I will contact you that way first. List the number you are most likely to answer FIRST and give me a backup number second. Do NOT give me your work number. Again, if you are letting me call you at work, I assume you are not paying attention at your current job.
Your phone needs to be as innocuous as your email address. I hate to hear "please enjoy the music while your party is reached." Seriously, that is something high school kids have on their phone. And, when it is that insane country song where the woman attacks her ex's car, I assume you are a redneck nutjob. If it is a Lady Gaga song, I assume you are a clubber, who will show up at work with a hangover. For the time being, change your phone to just ring. And, just give me your name and tell me to leave a message in your voicemail. Cutesy messages make me assume you are immature. If your message is your child, at least make sure you can actually understand what the kid is saying. I may assume it's you on a bender, not your two-year-old trying to say that I've reached his Mommy. Change it to whatever you want when your job search is over. But, keep it pro for the search.
Do NOT put your picture on your resume. See above about discrimination. Plus, unless you are 18 and have your class photo, how many of us have a good wallet size photo of ourselves?
Do not list your hobbies unless they have something to do with what you are applying for. I don't care if you won a 3rd place ribbon for your pies. I do care if you were the secretary for your pie baking club and did excel spreadsheets for them.
References
You have no idea how many people completely screw this up. I kid you not, I saw a resume that listed the head of the company the person was applying for as a reference. The head of the company had NEVER met this person and had no idea who they were. Turns out this guy's MOM worked as a contractor for the company and thought that since she'd met said Company Head a few times, she'd add that to his resume and make it easy for him to get the job. It got him banned from ever applying again, because if you are so stupid you list a person as a reference who doesn't know you... you are pretty much not going to be in running for Employee of the Month.
List no more than 3 references. If you have a ton, you can add the tag line "Additional references on request". Personally, I never call the resume listed references. They are hand-picked by the applicant to make them shine (unless you are the above reference idiot). I want to talk to the person's boss, or better yet, the boss's assistant. Yeah, how you treat an administrative assistant says a lot about you. And, don't think they won't dish when I ask them!
Only put references on if you have extra room. The tag line at the bottom of your resume for those is good enough. Like I said, I don't know anyone that calls the ones on your resume.
Spell check
OK, spell check has made us lazy. We assume it will fix everything. But, the simple truth is, it doesn't know WHAT word you are using. You may be trying to say that you "worked as liaison between management and employees." But, you typed "worked ass liaison" and you won't know it if you do not get someone besides yourself to go through your resume. You've been looking at the stupid thing for hours. You can't see your errors any more. So, get a smart friend (who has great grammatical and spelling skills) to proof it for you.
Do NOT put your picture on your resume. See above about discrimination. Plus, unless you are 18 and have your class photo, how many of us have a good wallet size photo of ourselves?
Do not list your hobbies unless they have something to do with what you are applying for. I don't care if you won a 3rd place ribbon for your pies. I do care if you were the secretary for your pie baking club and did excel spreadsheets for them.
References
You have no idea how many people completely screw this up. I kid you not, I saw a resume that listed the head of the company the person was applying for as a reference. The head of the company had NEVER met this person and had no idea who they were. Turns out this guy's MOM worked as a contractor for the company and thought that since she'd met said Company Head a few times, she'd add that to his resume and make it easy for him to get the job. It got him banned from ever applying again, because if you are so stupid you list a person as a reference who doesn't know you... you are pretty much not going to be in running for Employee of the Month.
List no more than 3 references. If you have a ton, you can add the tag line "Additional references on request". Personally, I never call the resume listed references. They are hand-picked by the applicant to make them shine (unless you are the above reference idiot). I want to talk to the person's boss, or better yet, the boss's assistant. Yeah, how you treat an administrative assistant says a lot about you. And, don't think they won't dish when I ask them!
Only put references on if you have extra room. The tag line at the bottom of your resume for those is good enough. Like I said, I don't know anyone that calls the ones on your resume.
Spell check
OK, spell check has made us lazy. We assume it will fix everything. But, the simple truth is, it doesn't know WHAT word you are using. You may be trying to say that you "worked as liaison between management and employees." But, you typed "worked ass liaison" and you won't know it if you do not get someone besides yourself to go through your resume. You've been looking at the stupid thing for hours. You can't see your errors any more. So, get a smart friend (who has great grammatical and spelling skills) to proof it for you.
Format
This is so individual, but a chronological resume is an easy read. Just list the years, the location and your position. You can clarify on your actual application or in the body of the listing for each position.
Again, list your most current and any relevant. Even if you do not want your current employer contacted, list them. Just put to the side that you do not want them contacted. If you leave them off, I'm going to wonder why you are not employed at present.
Education
Don't list every single school ever attended. If you have a college degree, list only that. I know you graduated high school to get to college. List any certifications that are big deals. If you are a nurse, I know you are CPR certified, but I don't know that you are Critical Care certified. If you are an administrative assistant, I know that you know Excel, but I don't know that you are certified to teach it.
Again, BE HONEST. Be concise and be neat and professional. Here's a good example of a simple resume.
Name (First, Middle Initial Last and any professional designation letters such as RN or PhD)
Address
Email address
Phone
Objective: To obtain a job in correctional nursing, within a county jail setting.
(Note: Make this specific to each job you apply for. Generic resumes are just that... generic. If you customize each resume, throwing in things you see in the ad, I know you paid attention)
Work History
1999-present Nurse Manager of Psychiatric Unit Hullbaloo Nursing Home Kalamazoo, KY
Responsible for 43 patients and supervision of 6 nurses and 4 CNAs. Provided medications, dressing changes and administering testing. Responsible for hiring, counseling, terminating, evaluating and education of all employees on that wing.
1994-1999 Psychiatric Nurse Wiggly Hill Nursing Home Gizzardville, AR
Started as floor nurse in skilled unit, then progressed to psychiatric unit. In 1996 I received advanced certification in Psychiatric Nursing. Before leaving this position, I was the relief manager over the unit.
1990-1994 Line Cook Wiggly Hill Diner Gizzardville, AR
While in nursing school, I worked part time at the diner.
Education
1994 Bachelor of Science Nursing East Gizzard University
1996 Advanced Certification in Psychiatric Nursing from WiggaWoo Nursing
(note: if you have tons of certifications, you may want to add a section for certs. Only list the relevant ones)
Skills
Excel, Word, Power Point and blah blah blah proficient.
(note: only list this section if you can't work your skills into the briefs under your jobs above. You should be able to work most everything in above, but since this is a nursing resume, these skills would be something some nurses wouldn't have and that may not be a "normal" skill for nurses to have, but would be valuable).
References Available Upon Request
Up Next, how to fill out a job application (I'll give you a hint, don't dot your i's with little hearts and never say, "I'll explain in person")
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Loaves and Fishes
I am a Christian. Always have been, always will be. I don't have a dramatic story to share about my faith. I didn't come to it late in life after years of treachery and debauchery. I was never another religion and came to this one. I never had a huge crisis in faith that led me to hate God and then come back to him. No, I've always had a very strong faith. Through all the trials in my life (which compared to many are very small trials), I've had my faith as a rock. I don't talk about it much, unless someone asks. I'm not one to testify and to go out and spread the word.
I grew up in a family as diverse in its beliefs as most any could be. I grew up in a Methodist church, but in our family we had Mormons, Atheists, Agnostics, Baptists and other assorted Christians and just to round things out, my brother is Jewish (he converted from Christianity to Judaism when he was in college). As a result of all of this, I'm as religiously tolerant as it gets. I don't hate you if you don't believe as I do. I just know how I feel, and I'm happy in my religion.
As I said, I grew up in a small Methodist church. I was one of just a handful of kids in the church, and probably 75% of the people there were elderly, so I felt like I had dozens of grandparents. I don't remember a time when I didn't know the words to the Lord's Prayer, the Apostle's Creed, Doxology, etc. The hymns were as familiar to me as the sound of my own breath. I felt comfortable there, I felt loved, I felt safe. I knew God loved me and I loved him. I never felt the fire of faith, more the warm glow of it.
As I got older, I just fell out of the habit of going to church. I missed it, but many of the people I loved so much in the church had passed away. Others had come, who seemed intent on alienating as many people as they could and reshaping our little church into their own image. So, I just did not go. But, I missed it. I missed that warm glow.
I tried a few different churches. I went to one with a full band, several jumbotron type big screens. They did a skit in the middle of the church that basically told us if we didn't kick in our fair share into the offering, we were rotten. They had Corian countertops in the bathrooms. I wondered how many people could have been fed with the money it took for all the trappings in that church. I did not feel God there. I'm not saying he wasn't there. I'm just saying he wasn't there for ME.
Over the years, a friend of ours told us that a man who had worked for my Dad (and with whom Chad had worked), was now a minister in a church in Piney Flats. Dad and I said several times we should go. We didn't. Then, my friend Tammie and I reconnected when she moved back from Texas. She was going to this same church. She mentioned what a wonderful minister they had. I mentioned we knew him. She invited us. I still didn't go, but mentioned it to Dad once again.
Several weeks later, I just felt like I should give it a shot. I called Dad, he agreed at once that he'd love to go. Mom said for us to see what we thought, and she'd give it a shot later. Chad pretty much said the same thing. We decided to go that Sunday. We got there early. Dad wore a suit and I wore a dress. We worried that maybe we were overdressed or underdressed. We worried that we would sit in someone's pew, which, in some churches is the equivalent of spitting in the holy water. Mostly, we just worried we wouldn't like it.
Turns out that the man we knew was gone that week, and the lay-speaker (a member who fills in when the minister is gone) was doing the sermon. The hymns were ones I knew. The doxology once again made me feel warm inside. The people held hands as they prayed. It made me a little nervous, but was kind of nice. Before everything got underway, they had a meet and greet where everyone said Hello to their neighbor. No less than 10 people welcomed us.
I can honestly say, I do not remember what the sermon was about. I was so moved. The layspeaker, Mike Berry, spoke from the heart. At times, he teared up when talking about his family and his church family. The earnest sincerity that he showed, the kindness of his words were a warmth all their own. But, more than warmth, it was something.... warmer. Something more. I couldn't quite explain it. But, I knew I liked it. Dad and I weren't even out the door and we were both saying we'd be back the next Sunday. We called Mom from the car, so excited to have found this place!
We went back the next Sunday, and the Minister was back. I knew Chad and Dad both had a tremendous amount of respect for this man, Estel Williams. Little did I know that this man would another part of this wonderful warming of my faith. His first sermon was on how we cannot beat people over the head with how they're going to Hell if they aren't like us, don't think like us, etc. As he said, if you preach hate, do you think people will believe we love? Of course not. His sermon was all about love, whether or not we deserve it. Love for everyone.
I noticed something else that week. I noticed that the church wasn't full of people who all looked alike. It was full of diversity. My friend David (Tammie's husband) is from Mexico, and he is a member there. There were all age groups, all colors, folks with tattoos and piercings, and little old ladies in polyester. And, they all shook hands, held hands when they prayed, worked on committees together.
That tiny little warmth of faith in me, began to catch fire. Each Sunday, I saw amazing things. A tiny little church, rarely over 200 people in attendance, has a Bible School every summer that brings in more kids than we have members. And, I (who am terrified of children) have somehow become the Bible School Mascot. I've been a surfer lady, a fox and a green gorilla for outerspace. I never thought I could minister to kids. But, this church found a way around my fears.
I have gone on retreats. I have prayed. I've had people pray for me. I've had a tiny spark of faith grow and grow and grow until I honestly feel a fire within me. I am still not good at discussing my faith. But, today I realized how I can describe it. And, oddly enough, it's through a miracle that happened around 2000 years ago. Jesus fed the multitudes with just a handful of loaves and fishes. They just expanded in a way no one could explain. No one really saw it happen. No one realized it had happened, really, until it was over and they realized they fed all those people and had more in leftovers than they started with.
Our little church fed 81 families yesterday. over 7000 pounds of food to people in dire need. A food pantry that is in the basement of that little church doles out miracles once a month. Taking from these few and making enough for many. Loaves and fishes.
And, at 38 years old, I have a stronger faith and a bigger heart and a clearer drive to help others, all because of a church. It took my tiny faith and made it big. It took my loaves and fishes and made them into food for multitudes in me. I know that may not even make sense, but it's th best I can do.
As I said, I will never show up at your door with a little pamphlet telling you that you're going to Hell if you don't go to my church. I will never push you for information or even just talk to you about my faith unless you ask me, most likely. But, there are other things I can do. And, other things I will do. I'll try so hard to be a good example. I will try to help you if you need it. I will try to love people and be good to them. I've decided, just tonight, that I'm going to participate in a mission this year, for the first time ever in my life. Typical me, I decided it an hour after the meeting I should have gone to. But, that is another thing I love about my little church. They know I'm a procrastinator, and trust me, they'll clue me in when I ask and get me there on time.
I have no idea why I wrote this tonight. I just felt the need to do so. Maybe God knows I'm not comfortable knocking on doors, but that my faith fire can be shared in another way. Maybe he gave me the power of words all these years, just so I could type away tonight. Maybe someone needs to read this, or maybe I just needed to write it to get it straight in my head. Who knows?
All I know is that I wasn't starving for faith, but had no idea how bland the version of faith I had was, until I found the place I was supposed to be. I am supposed to be at Edgefield United Methodist Church in Piney Flats, TN. I am supposed to do something there. I have no idea what. But, I have no doubt that some day I'll figure it out.
In the mean time, I'm sure I'll be some sort of puppet this summer for VBS and that I will cry every now and then in church when my heart is so full of love that it has to leak out (I cried during a baptism this morning). If your heart is hungry, if you are feeling unsatisfied with the bland faith you have, if you are searching, but have no idea where to find your faith. Or if you are searching for warmth, or even fire, and you'd like to know more. Please, let me know. I'd be happy to bring you to church with me.
Oh, you don't have to wear a suit or a dress. I wore jeans and a leopard print sweater today. I'm pretty sure that God understands why I hate pantyhose. He still lets me be his kid, even when I wear Walmart jeans to his house. The fact that the people in my church understand that is just one more example of why I love them, and that church. They are my loaves and fishes. They feed me and feed the fire of my faith. I am truly blessed.
I grew up in a family as diverse in its beliefs as most any could be. I grew up in a Methodist church, but in our family we had Mormons, Atheists, Agnostics, Baptists and other assorted Christians and just to round things out, my brother is Jewish (he converted from Christianity to Judaism when he was in college). As a result of all of this, I'm as religiously tolerant as it gets. I don't hate you if you don't believe as I do. I just know how I feel, and I'm happy in my religion.
As I said, I grew up in a small Methodist church. I was one of just a handful of kids in the church, and probably 75% of the people there were elderly, so I felt like I had dozens of grandparents. I don't remember a time when I didn't know the words to the Lord's Prayer, the Apostle's Creed, Doxology, etc. The hymns were as familiar to me as the sound of my own breath. I felt comfortable there, I felt loved, I felt safe. I knew God loved me and I loved him. I never felt the fire of faith, more the warm glow of it.
As I got older, I just fell out of the habit of going to church. I missed it, but many of the people I loved so much in the church had passed away. Others had come, who seemed intent on alienating as many people as they could and reshaping our little church into their own image. So, I just did not go. But, I missed it. I missed that warm glow.
I tried a few different churches. I went to one with a full band, several jumbotron type big screens. They did a skit in the middle of the church that basically told us if we didn't kick in our fair share into the offering, we were rotten. They had Corian countertops in the bathrooms. I wondered how many people could have been fed with the money it took for all the trappings in that church. I did not feel God there. I'm not saying he wasn't there. I'm just saying he wasn't there for ME.
Over the years, a friend of ours told us that a man who had worked for my Dad (and with whom Chad had worked), was now a minister in a church in Piney Flats. Dad and I said several times we should go. We didn't. Then, my friend Tammie and I reconnected when she moved back from Texas. She was going to this same church. She mentioned what a wonderful minister they had. I mentioned we knew him. She invited us. I still didn't go, but mentioned it to Dad once again.
Several weeks later, I just felt like I should give it a shot. I called Dad, he agreed at once that he'd love to go. Mom said for us to see what we thought, and she'd give it a shot later. Chad pretty much said the same thing. We decided to go that Sunday. We got there early. Dad wore a suit and I wore a dress. We worried that maybe we were overdressed or underdressed. We worried that we would sit in someone's pew, which, in some churches is the equivalent of spitting in the holy water. Mostly, we just worried we wouldn't like it.
Turns out that the man we knew was gone that week, and the lay-speaker (a member who fills in when the minister is gone) was doing the sermon. The hymns were ones I knew. The doxology once again made me feel warm inside. The people held hands as they prayed. It made me a little nervous, but was kind of nice. Before everything got underway, they had a meet and greet where everyone said Hello to their neighbor. No less than 10 people welcomed us.
I can honestly say, I do not remember what the sermon was about. I was so moved. The layspeaker, Mike Berry, spoke from the heart. At times, he teared up when talking about his family and his church family. The earnest sincerity that he showed, the kindness of his words were a warmth all their own. But, more than warmth, it was something.... warmer. Something more. I couldn't quite explain it. But, I knew I liked it. Dad and I weren't even out the door and we were both saying we'd be back the next Sunday. We called Mom from the car, so excited to have found this place!
We went back the next Sunday, and the Minister was back. I knew Chad and Dad both had a tremendous amount of respect for this man, Estel Williams. Little did I know that this man would another part of this wonderful warming of my faith. His first sermon was on how we cannot beat people over the head with how they're going to Hell if they aren't like us, don't think like us, etc. As he said, if you preach hate, do you think people will believe we love? Of course not. His sermon was all about love, whether or not we deserve it. Love for everyone.
I noticed something else that week. I noticed that the church wasn't full of people who all looked alike. It was full of diversity. My friend David (Tammie's husband) is from Mexico, and he is a member there. There were all age groups, all colors, folks with tattoos and piercings, and little old ladies in polyester. And, they all shook hands, held hands when they prayed, worked on committees together.
That tiny little warmth of faith in me, began to catch fire. Each Sunday, I saw amazing things. A tiny little church, rarely over 200 people in attendance, has a Bible School every summer that brings in more kids than we have members. And, I (who am terrified of children) have somehow become the Bible School Mascot. I've been a surfer lady, a fox and a green gorilla for outerspace. I never thought I could minister to kids. But, this church found a way around my fears.
I have gone on retreats. I have prayed. I've had people pray for me. I've had a tiny spark of faith grow and grow and grow until I honestly feel a fire within me. I am still not good at discussing my faith. But, today I realized how I can describe it. And, oddly enough, it's through a miracle that happened around 2000 years ago. Jesus fed the multitudes with just a handful of loaves and fishes. They just expanded in a way no one could explain. No one really saw it happen. No one realized it had happened, really, until it was over and they realized they fed all those people and had more in leftovers than they started with.
Our little church fed 81 families yesterday. over 7000 pounds of food to people in dire need. A food pantry that is in the basement of that little church doles out miracles once a month. Taking from these few and making enough for many. Loaves and fishes.
And, at 38 years old, I have a stronger faith and a bigger heart and a clearer drive to help others, all because of a church. It took my tiny faith and made it big. It took my loaves and fishes and made them into food for multitudes in me. I know that may not even make sense, but it's th best I can do.
As I said, I will never show up at your door with a little pamphlet telling you that you're going to Hell if you don't go to my church. I will never push you for information or even just talk to you about my faith unless you ask me, most likely. But, there are other things I can do. And, other things I will do. I'll try so hard to be a good example. I will try to help you if you need it. I will try to love people and be good to them. I've decided, just tonight, that I'm going to participate in a mission this year, for the first time ever in my life. Typical me, I decided it an hour after the meeting I should have gone to. But, that is another thing I love about my little church. They know I'm a procrastinator, and trust me, they'll clue me in when I ask and get me there on time.
I have no idea why I wrote this tonight. I just felt the need to do so. Maybe God knows I'm not comfortable knocking on doors, but that my faith fire can be shared in another way. Maybe he gave me the power of words all these years, just so I could type away tonight. Maybe someone needs to read this, or maybe I just needed to write it to get it straight in my head. Who knows?
All I know is that I wasn't starving for faith, but had no idea how bland the version of faith I had was, until I found the place I was supposed to be. I am supposed to be at Edgefield United Methodist Church in Piney Flats, TN. I am supposed to do something there. I have no idea what. But, I have no doubt that some day I'll figure it out.
In the mean time, I'm sure I'll be some sort of puppet this summer for VBS and that I will cry every now and then in church when my heart is so full of love that it has to leak out (I cried during a baptism this morning). If your heart is hungry, if you are feeling unsatisfied with the bland faith you have, if you are searching, but have no idea where to find your faith. Or if you are searching for warmth, or even fire, and you'd like to know more. Please, let me know. I'd be happy to bring you to church with me.
Oh, you don't have to wear a suit or a dress. I wore jeans and a leopard print sweater today. I'm pretty sure that God understands why I hate pantyhose. He still lets me be his kid, even when I wear Walmart jeans to his house. The fact that the people in my church understand that is just one more example of why I love them, and that church. They are my loaves and fishes. They feed me and feed the fire of my faith. I am truly blessed.
Sunday, January 23, 2011
What would you do if you knew that you could not fail?
That's a quote I see often on paperweights, posters, coasters and t-shirts. Never give it much thought other than thinking I'd love to be a writer, but the inability to do anything for long periods of time totally shreds that.
However, in my car the other day, on my way home from work, I realized what I would absolutely LOVE to do if I could make a living at it: I'd love to help people navigate healthcare.
I guess the job would probably need a snazzy title like "Patient Advocate" but hospitals already have those. But, I wouldn't be working for the hospital. I would be working for the patient. For the patient's family. For the people who need healthcare and are having trouble getting it, or getting it paid for, or even understanding it.
When I went through nursing school, one of the things they hammered into us was patient education. Your patient was to know what tests they were having, why they were having them, what medications they were getting and why, what their diagnoses mean, what doctors they would need to follow-up with and what the prescriptions were that we discharged them on.
This seems to be a thing of the past. I cannot tell you how many people call me after getting home from the hospital and ask me what their diagnosis means, or why they sent them home on a medication. When I ask them, "did the nurse not tell you?" They answer, I didn't even see the nurse after the doctor discharged me." Or, " they just told me to sign the form and told me see my doctor in 2 weeks and they'd cover everything with me. What are you supposed to do for that 2 weeks? Just wonder if you are to continue your old meds and then new ones? Wonder if Congestive Heart failure means that your heart is failing and you will die soon?
Then, you have the wrangling you have to do with insurance. I'm going thru it right now. We switched insurance last year THREE TIMES. Once when Chad quit his job (I put us on the insurance thru my employer for 3 months), then the insurance county had, then the insurance that county switched to. So, now they've billed the wrong insurance for some labs and are telling me I have to pay $300, because they won't refile. I don't think so. I've called, written, faxed and emailed and it's taken me about 3 weeks. All for labs in JUNE of last year. Now, find me a 70 year old that could sort all this out. Not gonna happen.
Then, you have people who go to several different doctors. Sure, they take their prescriptions with them, but what if Dr. A thinks you are on Spironolactone because you need to drop fluid from your congestive heart failure, but instead you are on it because of ascites from cirrhosis and they change you to a different medication?? How many people know the exact reason they are on a medication? Very few.
Not everyone would need someone to coordinate their care. Only those with several diagnoses or with medical issues that their insurance is fighting to not pay. Or, even those who have to go to multiple doctors or have frequent hospitalizations.
People call me all the time to ask me questions and it's usually one of the above type questions. It is one of the greatest honors in my life that people trust me enough to ask me these types of questions. No joke. I truly don't mind it, I am just so thankful to have the education and experience to do this. I just wish I could do it on a larger scale and help more people. I know so many people need help in these areas.
So, I guess if I could do anything and not fail, I'd help the folks who are being neglected, forgotten or abused BY our healthcare systems. I guess I'd call myself a Healthcare Navigator or Health Guide. And, if ever I could actually do this full time (rather than calls from friends at random times), I'd call myself lucky and blessed. Of course, I'm that already, so even if I never try, it's okay.
However, in my car the other day, on my way home from work, I realized what I would absolutely LOVE to do if I could make a living at it: I'd love to help people navigate healthcare.
I guess the job would probably need a snazzy title like "Patient Advocate" but hospitals already have those. But, I wouldn't be working for the hospital. I would be working for the patient. For the patient's family. For the people who need healthcare and are having trouble getting it, or getting it paid for, or even understanding it.
When I went through nursing school, one of the things they hammered into us was patient education. Your patient was to know what tests they were having, why they were having them, what medications they were getting and why, what their diagnoses mean, what doctors they would need to follow-up with and what the prescriptions were that we discharged them on.
This seems to be a thing of the past. I cannot tell you how many people call me after getting home from the hospital and ask me what their diagnosis means, or why they sent them home on a medication. When I ask them, "did the nurse not tell you?" They answer, I didn't even see the nurse after the doctor discharged me." Or, " they just told me to sign the form and told me see my doctor in 2 weeks and they'd cover everything with me. What are you supposed to do for that 2 weeks? Just wonder if you are to continue your old meds and then new ones? Wonder if Congestive Heart failure means that your heart is failing and you will die soon?
Then, you have the wrangling you have to do with insurance. I'm going thru it right now. We switched insurance last year THREE TIMES. Once when Chad quit his job (I put us on the insurance thru my employer for 3 months), then the insurance county had, then the insurance that county switched to. So, now they've billed the wrong insurance for some labs and are telling me I have to pay $300, because they won't refile. I don't think so. I've called, written, faxed and emailed and it's taken me about 3 weeks. All for labs in JUNE of last year. Now, find me a 70 year old that could sort all this out. Not gonna happen.
Then, you have people who go to several different doctors. Sure, they take their prescriptions with them, but what if Dr. A thinks you are on Spironolactone because you need to drop fluid from your congestive heart failure, but instead you are on it because of ascites from cirrhosis and they change you to a different medication?? How many people know the exact reason they are on a medication? Very few.
Not everyone would need someone to coordinate their care. Only those with several diagnoses or with medical issues that their insurance is fighting to not pay. Or, even those who have to go to multiple doctors or have frequent hospitalizations.
People call me all the time to ask me questions and it's usually one of the above type questions. It is one of the greatest honors in my life that people trust me enough to ask me these types of questions. No joke. I truly don't mind it, I am just so thankful to have the education and experience to do this. I just wish I could do it on a larger scale and help more people. I know so many people need help in these areas.
So, I guess if I could do anything and not fail, I'd help the folks who are being neglected, forgotten or abused BY our healthcare systems. I guess I'd call myself a Healthcare Navigator or Health Guide. And, if ever I could actually do this full time (rather than calls from friends at random times), I'd call myself lucky and blessed. Of course, I'm that already, so even if I never try, it's okay.
Sunday, January 16, 2011
So... What do YOU do?
It's a question I somewhat dread. You're standing at the party, and the "look at that weather, huh?" small talk has run out. So, the next small talk conversation: jobs.
They turn to me, smiling and ask "So... what do YOU do?" I used to say, "I'm a nurse." Then, the person I am telling would smile and say, "Oh, what a wonderful job. Nurses are just such angels." No doubt, they have visions of me saving babies and healing the innocents of the world. Um... not so much.
So, now, before they have time to cannonize me as Saint Emily of the Helpful Soul, I answer, "I'm a nurse at the jail," or if it is someone who has that Holier Than Thou air about them, I throw out the fact that I run the medical department. It doesn't really matter, because they all get this horrified look on their faces when I say it. I know in their mind, they are hearing that part in "Silence of the Lambs" when they talk about Hanibal Lecter eating the nurses tongue in the jail and his heart rate never going up.
After a moment of stunned silence, they recompose themselves and say the same thing, every time. "Oh, that must be an interesting job."
Lady, we just had a transsexual yell at us because he isn't getting his premarin and if I get told once a day someone is going to sue me, it's a slow day. I've had a crazy pregnant chick on crack try to attack me and the DOCTOR took her down!!! I've yelled at a probable serial killer. I've been yelled at by more than one! I've learned more about hiding places for drugs on the human body than I EVER wanted to. I've learned what street names for drugs are. I've got a hand-drawn Christmas card featuring Charlie Brown on it from a guy who is serving 30-something years. I've learned that most any pill can be crushed and snorted (even if it doesn't do anything, it just seems to make them happy to do it). I've seen boils in places I NEVER wanted to see.
Interesting doesn't quite do it justice!!! But, it is the most fun job I've ever had. There is no way in the world I could go back to being a normal nurse now!!
The next question: "Don't you get scared?" My first day, I thought I was doing really great. I was just amazed that I wasn't more nervous. Then, I looked down at the pack of meds I was holding, and realized my hands were shaking. So much for calm, cool and collected!!
But, after a while, I came to realize I feel safer (and am safer) than anywhere I've ever worked. Most of the places I worked had large amounts of narcotics laying around and absolutely NO security staff. It's a recipe for disaster, and I cannot believe that something bad hasn't happened because of that. But, I am surrounded by security where I'm at. We have absolutely NO narcotics and we are NEVER alone with the inmates. How much safer could it be?? The one time someone started to attack, within 15 seconds we had so many officers in there, you couldn't stir them with a stick. NO ONE messes with us! It's awesome!!
Next up: "What on earth do you do when you see them out??" OK, that one did worry me when I first started. I am still cautious when I am out. I keep a better eye on my surroundings than I ever have. But, I really haven't had issues. As funny as it is, I've ran into a lot of our, ahem, clients out. And, I am amazed that they are actually super nice! They usually tell me how they are doing. Then, a lot of times, they want to introduce me to their family! "This is Nurse Emily! The one I told you about!" Makes me wonder what their dinner conversations are like...
I love to talk about my job. I love to tell people the day to day pieces of it, but due to confidentiality, there is a lot I can't say. But, I thought some of you who don't work in this field might get a kick out of this. Ask me about my job any time you want. I can guarantee you I've got a story or twelve that'll make you laugh your butt off!!!
They turn to me, smiling and ask "So... what do YOU do?" I used to say, "I'm a nurse." Then, the person I am telling would smile and say, "Oh, what a wonderful job. Nurses are just such angels." No doubt, they have visions of me saving babies and healing the innocents of the world. Um... not so much.
So, now, before they have time to cannonize me as Saint Emily of the Helpful Soul, I answer, "I'm a nurse at the jail," or if it is someone who has that Holier Than Thou air about them, I throw out the fact that I run the medical department. It doesn't really matter, because they all get this horrified look on their faces when I say it. I know in their mind, they are hearing that part in "Silence of the Lambs" when they talk about Hanibal Lecter eating the nurses tongue in the jail and his heart rate never going up.
After a moment of stunned silence, they recompose themselves and say the same thing, every time. "Oh, that must be an interesting job."
Lady, we just had a transsexual yell at us because he isn't getting his premarin and if I get told once a day someone is going to sue me, it's a slow day. I've had a crazy pregnant chick on crack try to attack me and the DOCTOR took her down!!! I've yelled at a probable serial killer. I've been yelled at by more than one! I've learned more about hiding places for drugs on the human body than I EVER wanted to. I've learned what street names for drugs are. I've got a hand-drawn Christmas card featuring Charlie Brown on it from a guy who is serving 30-something years. I've learned that most any pill can be crushed and snorted (even if it doesn't do anything, it just seems to make them happy to do it). I've seen boils in places I NEVER wanted to see.
Interesting doesn't quite do it justice!!! But, it is the most fun job I've ever had. There is no way in the world I could go back to being a normal nurse now!!
The next question: "Don't you get scared?" My first day, I thought I was doing really great. I was just amazed that I wasn't more nervous. Then, I looked down at the pack of meds I was holding, and realized my hands were shaking. So much for calm, cool and collected!!
But, after a while, I came to realize I feel safer (and am safer) than anywhere I've ever worked. Most of the places I worked had large amounts of narcotics laying around and absolutely NO security staff. It's a recipe for disaster, and I cannot believe that something bad hasn't happened because of that. But, I am surrounded by security where I'm at. We have absolutely NO narcotics and we are NEVER alone with the inmates. How much safer could it be?? The one time someone started to attack, within 15 seconds we had so many officers in there, you couldn't stir them with a stick. NO ONE messes with us! It's awesome!!
Next up: "What on earth do you do when you see them out??" OK, that one did worry me when I first started. I am still cautious when I am out. I keep a better eye on my surroundings than I ever have. But, I really haven't had issues. As funny as it is, I've ran into a lot of our, ahem, clients out. And, I am amazed that they are actually super nice! They usually tell me how they are doing. Then, a lot of times, they want to introduce me to their family! "This is Nurse Emily! The one I told you about!" Makes me wonder what their dinner conversations are like...
I love to talk about my job. I love to tell people the day to day pieces of it, but due to confidentiality, there is a lot I can't say. But, I thought some of you who don't work in this field might get a kick out of this. Ask me about my job any time you want. I can guarantee you I've got a story or twelve that'll make you laugh your butt off!!!
Update on the sugar free cake/brownie mix
I cannot voice to you how amazingly good the Pillsbury sugar free mixes are. And, it wasn't merely my carb-starved self that thought so! I had a widely varied test group on the chocolate cake and everyone from the 9 year old to the 96 year old said it was fantastic. It was super-fluffy (if that's a word. Very light) and the icing is fabulous. I could have eaten the whole can without even the cake.
I made the brownies tonight. The mix is so thick when you make it, it's like fudge modeling clay or something. I was pretty worried about it. But, my fears were for naught! It was delicious. Chad is a picky man when it comes to brownies. He wolfed one down and took 2 to work tonight. So, they are Chad tested and approved!!
I have not yet made the yellow cake mix, so I'll have to report back on it. I may try making the cake mix cookies with it. I also have yet to try the white icing. So, I'll update when we go through all this batch and are all sweet-starved again!
I made the brownies tonight. The mix is so thick when you make it, it's like fudge modeling clay or something. I was pretty worried about it. But, my fears were for naught! It was delicious. Chad is a picky man when it comes to brownies. He wolfed one down and took 2 to work tonight. So, they are Chad tested and approved!!
I have not yet made the yellow cake mix, so I'll have to report back on it. I may try making the cake mix cookies with it. I also have yet to try the white icing. So, I'll update when we go through all this batch and are all sweet-starved again!
Monday, January 10, 2011
Sugar Free and Low Carb Finds
Low Carb Happiness is abounding in my world!!!! I have found some new goodies!!!
The Carb Master Yogurt that I love from Kroger has new flavors!!! Tropical fruit is good, but the WINNER is... are you ready? Are you able to handle this????
Oh, it is so good! It has those lovely spices to it. Oh, good, good, good stuff.
And, a handful of new Low Sugar and Sugar Free stuff from Pillsbury is making its way to my house! I haven't tried them yet, but will do so and report back!
The Carb Master Yogurt that I love from Kroger has new flavors!!! Tropical fruit is good, but the WINNER is... are you ready? Are you able to handle this????
CARROT CAKE!!!!
Oh, it is so good! It has those lovely spices to it. Oh, good, good, good stuff.
And, a handful of new Low Sugar and Sugar Free stuff from Pillsbury is making its way to my house! I haven't tried them yet, but will do so and report back!
Chocolate, Chocolate, Chocolate.
Oh, and yellow cake mix, too.
Emily's gonna be bakin' soon!
I guess this is a short, information post, which is such an unusual thing for me. I usually go for long and useless. But, hey... gotta mix it up a little. Sometimes!!!
Saturday, January 8, 2011
Rest in Peace, Mittens
Mittens final journey is complete. His ashes came home with us today. To be such a huge presence in our lives for 15 years, his ashes were so tiny. Maybe 1/4 of a sandwich baggie worth. We got the perfect urn for him. We always laughed and said that despite the fact that he was a scaredy cat, he thought he was absolutely a god. That we should worship him and, really, so should everyone else.
The urn we found is an Egyptian goddess that looks like a cat. Bastet, goddess of (amongst many other things) joy. Fitting, I do believe.
The urn
I hadn't cried in several days, but did so last night when we brought his ashes home. I put them in his urn, and I just carried it around for a little while. I don't know why, but it was so hard to put that urn down. So, I just carried it over to the door and we stood and watched the snow. It was rather odd, but I think that was what I had to do so say goodbye this one last time. I talked to him for a little while and told him the story about when he was just a kitten and went flying out our front door and sunk right up over his head in the snow. That broke him of running outside for about 10 years. I know he wasn't there, couldn't hear it and wouldn't have understood it if he did hear it, but it felt good to tell him a little story about a time that made me smile.
Finally, I put him down on the library table that is under our TV. My original plan was to put him in the curio cabinet. But, for right now, I need to see the small reminder of him. So, in the living room he remains.
Rest in Peace, Mittens.
April 1996-December 21, 2010
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
We can be heroes...
"I, I will be king
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can be Heroes, just for one day
We can be us, just for one day"
-"Heroes" by David Bowie
My friend Charles posted a question on his Facebook today. It's one I've probably given a few seconds thought here and there through the years, but never really sat down and given deep consideration.
"Who inspires you?"
i thought about this all day today, off and on. As we all know, I have the attention span of a gnat, so that is how I think... off and on. So, it's been stewing in my brain, trying to figure out who inspires me. And, while that stew was cooking, another little thought, a side dish I suppose, was also baking...
"Who is your hero?"
I've always had a incredibly active imagination. I create whole worlds inside my head. I have made several attempts at writing them down, but due to the ADD thing... never works. I'm much better suited to short bits of writing like this. But, in those worlds, I am sometimes a hero. Not the kind with tights and a cape, just the kind with a good idea, and a helping hand. I win the lottery and help people who are down on their luck. I plan an entire building out just to distribute food to the needy. I revitalize a neglected downtown. In my little world I don't do it for recognition. Even in the real world, I don't do nice things then put up the neon arrow saying "Come here to praise me for what I did today!" I do the nice things because they make me feel good, and because sometimes people just need someone to be nice. I just wish I could do more of them in the real world, rather than the one in my head.
So, I realized that my heroes, idols and inspirations are the people who I model my other-worldly self after. The quiet heroes. The people who help and never tell anyone. The ones who quietly step in and make the world better and then quietly step out, often with no recognition.
I remember long-lost friend coming to see me in the hospital and bringing his family photo albums. I didn't know his family at all. But, he wove these wonderful stories about his family, like a vivid tapestry. He got me so involved in the stories that I forgot to be scared and forgot how very badly I hurt. He didn't see it as doing a big thing, never expected the thanks I gave him. He just wanted to make me feel better. That is a hero to me. No cape, no tights.
I remember another time when I honestly thought my world was coming to an end. It was high school. I was the typical overly-dramatic drama queen teenage girl, but the problem felt so real to me. I hit a point in my life where I knew I could not continue a relationship and had to end it, but was so afraid of what I would be WITHOUT that relationship that it terrified me. I was stuck. And, I was scared, disappointed in myself and downright depressed. I reached out to one of my best friends and he dropped everything, came to see me and gave me some painful advice. He rubbed my back while I cried and held my hair while I puked and then made me get on the phone and end the relationship. Then repeated all the above steps after I did what had to be done. He also brought me gummy bears. Again, no cape, no tights, no article in the paper singing his praises, but he was my hero.
My friend Heather drove me home, so I could cry and hold my cat when I was told I had to put him to sleep. My husband carried 3 handkerchiefs to my Aunt Sandy's funeral, and again to my Uncle Ronnie's funeral, because he knew I never remember Kleenex and knew I would cry.
I could make lists and lists. But, I've babbled far too much.
I've never had a need for someone to swoop in with super-human strength and save me from a speeding train. I've never needed someone to whisk me out of a dangerous situation. So, maybe my idea of hero is different than others. But, the heroes that I know have made my life easier, more bearable. They have shaped who I am, in a positive way. They've saved me from pain, fear and most often and importantly, they've saved me from myself.
So, who inspires me? Who are my heroes? They are my friends, my family, my husband, my coworkers. They are the people who tell me it will be okay. The people who lead by example and SHOW me it will be okay. They are the people who take the risks to be what I need at that moment.
And, in my head, they have a cape, maybe even tights. And, they have my praise and eternal gratitude. It's not a bat signal, but it's the best I have.
And you, you will be queen
Though nothing will drive them away
We can be Heroes, just for one day
We can be us, just for one day"
-"Heroes" by David Bowie
My friend Charles posted a question on his Facebook today. It's one I've probably given a few seconds thought here and there through the years, but never really sat down and given deep consideration.
"Who inspires you?"
i thought about this all day today, off and on. As we all know, I have the attention span of a gnat, so that is how I think... off and on. So, it's been stewing in my brain, trying to figure out who inspires me. And, while that stew was cooking, another little thought, a side dish I suppose, was also baking...
"Who is your hero?"
I've always had a incredibly active imagination. I create whole worlds inside my head. I have made several attempts at writing them down, but due to the ADD thing... never works. I'm much better suited to short bits of writing like this. But, in those worlds, I am sometimes a hero. Not the kind with tights and a cape, just the kind with a good idea, and a helping hand. I win the lottery and help people who are down on their luck. I plan an entire building out just to distribute food to the needy. I revitalize a neglected downtown. In my little world I don't do it for recognition. Even in the real world, I don't do nice things then put up the neon arrow saying "Come here to praise me for what I did today!" I do the nice things because they make me feel good, and because sometimes people just need someone to be nice. I just wish I could do more of them in the real world, rather than the one in my head.
So, I realized that my heroes, idols and inspirations are the people who I model my other-worldly self after. The quiet heroes. The people who help and never tell anyone. The ones who quietly step in and make the world better and then quietly step out, often with no recognition.
I remember long-lost friend coming to see me in the hospital and bringing his family photo albums. I didn't know his family at all. But, he wove these wonderful stories about his family, like a vivid tapestry. He got me so involved in the stories that I forgot to be scared and forgot how very badly I hurt. He didn't see it as doing a big thing, never expected the thanks I gave him. He just wanted to make me feel better. That is a hero to me. No cape, no tights.
I remember another time when I honestly thought my world was coming to an end. It was high school. I was the typical overly-dramatic drama queen teenage girl, but the problem felt so real to me. I hit a point in my life where I knew I could not continue a relationship and had to end it, but was so afraid of what I would be WITHOUT that relationship that it terrified me. I was stuck. And, I was scared, disappointed in myself and downright depressed. I reached out to one of my best friends and he dropped everything, came to see me and gave me some painful advice. He rubbed my back while I cried and held my hair while I puked and then made me get on the phone and end the relationship. Then repeated all the above steps after I did what had to be done. He also brought me gummy bears. Again, no cape, no tights, no article in the paper singing his praises, but he was my hero.
My friend Heather drove me home, so I could cry and hold my cat when I was told I had to put him to sleep. My husband carried 3 handkerchiefs to my Aunt Sandy's funeral, and again to my Uncle Ronnie's funeral, because he knew I never remember Kleenex and knew I would cry.
I could make lists and lists. But, I've babbled far too much.
I've never had a need for someone to swoop in with super-human strength and save me from a speeding train. I've never needed someone to whisk me out of a dangerous situation. So, maybe my idea of hero is different than others. But, the heroes that I know have made my life easier, more bearable. They have shaped who I am, in a positive way. They've saved me from pain, fear and most often and importantly, they've saved me from myself.
So, who inspires me? Who are my heroes? They are my friends, my family, my husband, my coworkers. They are the people who tell me it will be okay. The people who lead by example and SHOW me it will be okay. They are the people who take the risks to be what I need at that moment.
And, in my head, they have a cape, maybe even tights. And, they have my praise and eternal gratitude. It's not a bat signal, but it's the best I have.
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